And did i tell you that I love you tonight?

Please Lock Me Away,

2009-06-21T12:06:00.007+08:00

HELLO THERE (non-existent readers),

It's been almost a year since I updated (eh heh heh) and here in the spirit of resurrection, and since I bothered to change my blog template, I PEN!. In a very succinct and to-the-point summary, here's what I've done with my life so far:

1. Worked for about 5 months at Pat's School House Jubilee Park

CHILDREN (: Yes including everything from changing diapers to feeding to speaking lots of chinese to the mandarin teachers, waking up at 7 each morning, to teaching 1 and a half year olds about taste (SOUR) and ANIMALS. And meeting incredibly cute and sweet Japanese boy Sota, whom I would marry if he were about 17 years older.

2. Did The Odyssey

With a lovely bunch of J3s, many many fattening trips to Brekos, and got to know an ADORABLE bunch of J1s! Not to mention getting to strut and look menacing.

3. Spent copious amounts of time around lovely friends

Les, Ed, Jas, Mark, Yel, Schwa, NING, Lindis. Not to mention Char, Kester, Diiwi the list goes on. Sleepovers, Dinners, Arashi not-quite-such a marathon.

4. ACCESS DENIED

Jasmin's production, self-written, work-shopped with Char, Mark, Les and Myself, including a slew of tech and crew that we have not yet seen but heard of. 25 JULY DO COME. I especially love Les's and Mark's stories, really compelling, to the point, and heart-wrenchingly real.

5. Night of Laughter!

Once again with a lovely bunch of J1s (Now if they would all just turn up at once hmph.) A Fairytale Malady that I wrote (What made me do it I really don't know) and am directing. I just really hope to creat a fun, collaborative, low-pressure but awesome production. I do hope its a fun experience for the juniors.

In the meantime, I got a hamster (from Hannah, and Pris sorta) named HAMU and a plant, with tiny lilac flowers named PETUNI (my sister forgot to write the A when she penned its name in permanent marker on its ceramic white pot) And of course, been crewing lots at school.

Oh yes I am going to NUS FASS, which half the globe is headed to and I'm quietly anticipating school to start! A few camps here and there to head to, I pray that NOL goes well and and and, thats IT! That's my holiday for you.

ANd now I am getting hungry. But before that, LAN with kester, dewei, mao, char, samw was surprisingly fun. You really wouldn't have expected it walking into a dark, dinghy kinda place, with the fluorescent computer screens beaming sinisterly at each blank and engrossed (mostly male) face, and all you can hear is a ringing chaos of machine gun shots and screams from those imaginary bleeding and gurgling figures on screen. But shooting a copious number of zombies was rather fun. So was trying to (and watching others try to) dance Dance Dance Revolution the next day and blindly sweeping my once-again-not-quite-real machine gun at animated enemies as topless and rippling Rambo, inviting (as I am told) curious and puzzled onlookers.

OK I UPDATED. ACHIEVEMENT OF THE YEAR (literally.)

Toodles!

A Random and Spasmodic Attempt at Updating My Blog.

2008-10-19T12:10:00.005+08:00

DEP DRAMA!

Whoring after Alumni Play Photoshoot ha.

An Edlyn Choreographed Dance!

Our Favourite Canteen Hangout.

Taj the Pimp.

Bacc Student Leaders!

Honours Night Sean Poh (slut)!

Madam and the Presidents Waha.

Oh Yeah 2AH-ers!

MAO MAO MAO

Ol' Lesley Sia.

Yuen DIWIII!

Ol' Comm (:

Principal Rollees and Special Awardees!

The Last Happy Days of School! (:
All courtesy of Facebook and others' cameras!

Now, A's.

2008-09-06T14:08:00.004+08:00

Its been a busy, fun-filled sept hols, with many many comm outings, jayne's birthday picnic, lindis's house, teachers' day, miss wong's birthday, madam's birthday, WALL. E wih joh, les, kester, nat, INVENTIO (it was real fun emceeing with mark whee), uh hur hur hana yori dango movie tribute to edlyn's fan-girliness. yes. whoo.

DAY I MET THE PRINCE @ ARTS HOUSE

TCHERS' DAY CELEBRATIONS

MADAM'S BIRTHDAY LUNCH

MANYMANY things to start worrying about now. OXFORD APPS. SATS. FINISH UP H3. A LEVELS. US APPS. yeah. all in the next 2 months. huzzah and wish me luck.

Oh Endless Night,

2008-08-15T23:18:00.003+08:00

One week of prelims DOWN and its an afternoon of slack and olympics (OMG SINGAPORE TEAM GOT INTO THE FINALS FOR TABLE TENNIS!!), and an undeserved breather and hoping that the night will never come to an end as tommorow brings new demands to hit the books once more.

It was an awesome match by the way, Singapore vs Korea team event. It was neck to neck point to point match to match, they even played an extra last tie breaker match which Feng Tian Wei won. Woo.

Watching lil' juniors in 'Day I met the Prince' tomorrow, and TAPESTRYYYY on Sunday, can't wait!

Just really wanted to say I wish tonight would never end and therefore even as my eyelids struggle to close upon me, I resist with all my might. The brooks of my defence shall be breeched soon though. And I just changed my sheets so they are all nice and crisp and fresh.

Alas endless night, Adieu.

3 MORE PAPERSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.

Pent Up and Bubbling Under.

2008-08-09T21:38:00.003+08:00

Am bored and feeling pent up like a holy relic at home. I NEED AIR. I NEED PEOPLE. But I know stepping into school will just divert me from my purpose (which I have on my own achieved just as well). Wellness, Homeways is Bestway skorry?

Watched the Beijing Olympic Opening Ceremony on tv, it was visually stunning. I was quite oddly very touched by it. China has its one huge chance to show the world all its got and it has so much to show. When you think of all the effort and money and how much the people put into it, its quite inspiring don't you think?

And its National Day so HAPPY BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE. The up and coming Fusionpolis is blocking our view of the fireworks though grr, so we only get a glimpse of the tips of its sparks and the glow behind the holes of the unfinished building.

I can only drown my surface sorrows in indulgence of food, its my only solace in these bleak days of fruitless study and impending examinations (I'd rather just do the exams tomorrow really.) But my sisters ate my last piece of Vienetta ice cream cake thingamajig. And so sugar induced relief is unattainable.

Oh somebody save me. Now pretty please.

Maybe alcohol will help, but I have nothing (let's say sparkling grapefruit juice, 90%) to go with my daddy's Absolut vodka.

Toss My Feathers.

2008-07-27T22:51:00.002+08:00

Very recently fallen in love with the Corrs unplugged thanks to a Youtube search of 'When Stars Go Blue' that is reminiscent at once of South Africa, and of Baby Comm's Becks, Lian and John's awesome acoustic version of it dedicated to us. Enjoy, its pretty awesome. And here to go with it, might as well, 'When Stars Go Blue'

Enjoy!

Countdown to Prelims: 2 Weeks.

Fly Count: 1 irritating one that just flew into my shirt!

Rolling Hay Going Gray.

2008-07-23T23:14:00.002+08:00

Ten thousand things weighing upon my heaving mind right now.

1. H3 Lit Essay. I got to actually start writing properly and not stare at my 300 words of intro and 1000-word essay plan. At least I have a plan ... ?

2. UNIVERSITY OPTIONS. Just researching, signing up for mailing lists and Common Application (People thinking of US unis, this would eventually likely be a must, a one-stop application thingimajig to many many the universities) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

3. Comm handover tmr. Comm, comm, comm, comm, comm. Will vomit thoughts out soon. It's really about time, to handover that is. (: Phew.

4. Errrr. Math homework for tomorrow.

5. PRELIMMMMSSSSS. YOU SHOULD BE STUDYING. (oh you know you should.)

6. The Dark Knight was pretty awesome. I slept till 2 in the afternoon with my headache, but still went to watch with Mummy anyway.

7. AH SHOULD GO TO SLEEP. Can't wait for David Ives Project on Fri and Comm dinner on Sat. Though that means likely that study time has been greatly diminished. But we gotta have a life. Really.

We changed again, and yet again, and it was now too late and too
far to go back, and I went on.

All the World's a stage, and the mists had all solemnly risen
now, and the world lay spread before me.

Technicolor Colour Dreams of a Bumbling Pressure Pot

2008-07-11T21:52:00.003+08:00

Growing tickles in the air,
Past any sort of humanly repair,
Drawing tumbles in the sky,
Why I sigh I know not why.
Fiddly-diddly-widdly-dum,
Twas' at night I hear those drums
Ringing Tingling in my ear
Rumbling hungry grumbling fear.
Toss and turn and turvy top,
Why I see I know quite not,
Swirling wiggles in my eye
Wildly dancing mad, Oh fie!

I tear upon my drooling rot
And gouge at sockets which I sought
To cease the droning voice I fought
To gaze upon my toes, Oh God!

Just a few more laps to free my soul
And all ahead paved sprinkling gold,
To look ahead the past will pall!
What good would it be to noose my neck
and tighten the rope and let my flapping limbs go fall?

I pat myself upon my back,
And tell myself I shall not fret!
I pick my pieces up, the lot
That scattered on the parking plot
10 feet below the stinking sod
One likes to call the likeness of God
And down the 10 feet plot I stare
Wondering truly how i'll fare
When my bits are blinking back at me
Crying out simultaneously,

'Oh please sir spare us the gruelling gore
That you inflict upon us no reason for,
And free us from this wretched plot
And save us from this plight we know not!'

So tumbling down the row of tickles I go,
Approaching the sound of the tingling drums,
A drum and drone and drune and drane,
I trickle back into fitful slumber,
Knowing not quite which dreadful number
of flock I vaguely recall counting
before the rumbling tumbles came calling.

I'M BACK FROM SOUTH AFRICA! WHEEEEE. (ha)

2008-07-10T23:19:00.004+08:00

Erm, yes indeed, I'm back from South Africa. Many eons ago. (: I shall begin my blogging endeavour again, SPURRED ON by the random assurance from my friends that they find it very amusing to read (I HAVE READERS). And, also because I decided to scan in stuff before I lose all the real life copies (which I probably will very soon) and partly because its THE END OF OUR OFFICIAL PERFORMANCE CAREER with the DEP showcase last night.

It was a blast wasn't it eh? Wore the hell out of us, everyone was walking corpses splaying out comatose on canteen tables, hair wet because they fell asleep last night and only washed their hair this morning, and a marked increase of spectacles-wearing, unable to pry their eyes open from lack of sleep. But it was all worth it. It always is. (:

SO here's a very random recap of my past life in these many months, more for my perusal than anything else, but here goes!

Comm in SA!

Entabeni was the ultimate awesomeness place on the planet.

At Jeppe Girls High! The greatest UNGLAM PHOTO much.

Last year's chilling PILLOWMAN. it was, WOW

PRIDE AND PREJUDICE 2008. I beam.

Bored in Econs Lecture.

ANDz DA Golden CHILD!

SINGLE IN SINAPORE.

Mmmmmmm. Awesome year. NOW TIME TO CHIONG FOR PRELIMS AND A's.

TATA WORLD!
(sorry if this scares you)

GOING TO SOUTH AFRICA TMR WHEE

2008-03-07T00:53:00.000+08:00

Put On A Steam Shower Cap.

2008-03-01T22:23:00.005+08:00

Just had my hair dyed and cut again. Its about 4 inches shorter quite amazingly, shortest in quite a long while. My mom decided to get the package for me, since my terminal and incurable condition of growing an immensely large proportion of hair that suffers from a lack of melanin will need long term treatment. (i.e. i gotta dye my white hair for however long) which covers the dye-ing and the after-treatment at $100.

After the whole saga of dyeing my much too long hair, some blue goo-ey substance was placed on my hair and i was shipped off with a towal band round my head to the spa room.

The spa room had a greeen glass wall with water perrenially flowing off it (much like the entrance to my condo if any of you notice it) and a kind of fish tank with well, fish swimming around in glass. So i was sat into a massage chair, and the roller thingamajigs staring whirring into action and I must say it is really quite uncomfortable. And so, the steam cap was placed onto my head over the towel band, which was attached of course to some machine which produced the steam. So there I was, lying in this semi-dark room with a glass wall of water flowing down with kinda eerie looking fish swimming in front of me. On a massage chair, with a orange blanket thrown over me with ny head in a bubble attched to some sort of machine. I must have looked like some mental patient in some sort of illicit brain experiment.

As steam fogged my eyes (The shower cap thing couldn't quite hold all the stem in its bubble), continuosly letting out wafts of mist just above my eyes, I stared at the water wall and fish fiddling around with the massage chair remote with rollers violating my poor back.

And it struck me that, I was 18. You wake up on that birthday and you never feel one bit different, but well there it is, I'm a week into being 18. My mom was mentioning something regarding zoo tickets (she's a tour guide you see), and it struck me that I can no longer pay the student's fare. That I was, officially an ADULT. HA.

In a few years, oh well at the end of THIS year, I'll be deciding what I want to do in the Future. I may darn well go overseas. What on earth it would be like to live alone far far far away from home, family and friends is quite mind-boggling. What I really want to do, I haven't got a clue. Sure yeah if I work hard and continue well I may likely have the perogative and privelege of picking and choosing (then again, at this rate maybe not), BUT WHAT ON EARTH TO CHOOSE. I got to be able to KEEP THIS LIFESTYLE UP. I have to PAY for my OWN $100 a time hair treatments in time not quite so far to come. WILL I BE ABLE TO?!

And so staring at the fish through the steam I thought, maybe I can be some kind of entrepreneur, start my own spa or something. I mean the female market is huge and hey Singaporean women are willing to spend on their looks (well what was I doing eh). Then I thought, what would I study then, do I really want to spend my life serving people in frivolous endeavours?

I really don't know. Still don't.

I'm One Hell of a Beautiful Disaster |

2008-02-27T20:37:00.003+08:00

It feels like i just got hit by a truck
Splayed out, beautifully
On the highway of glaring lights
For all to see.

The world passes me by in a swirl of frenzy
And time seems to be playing out on a delayed chain-reaction
Much like the first time i saw your goddamn beautiful face.

Faces, a flurry of faces,
each on coming into focus on it's own time.
Those lips of yours,
They seem to be moving,
They seem to be saying something.
But somehow I can't seem to hear anything,
Rather I seem to hear everything else.
I am an empty drain.

Streaks of neon lights lacerate the starless sky hanging overhead
Tearing it apart,
Slashes of the uninhibited.
I stare, and all seems silent.
Flashes hustling all around me.
Movement, a rush.
I am the only thing stationary.
Still twisted beauty.

The sky seems so damn heavy
Laying its weight only on me.
I feel as if i am about to die of afixiation,
Frankly, I didn't mind if I did.
I haven't blinked.
Those pretty glaring lights.
Your beautiful torn up face.

The space around engulfs me,
Space runs for miles and miles all around me.
Those lights, those slashing lights,
Each face,
Each word,
Each rush,
Each movement,
Play out in slow motion
As if i were watching through the lens of a high-speed camera.

It rains.
I see the raindrops splash onto the ground before me,
Each teardrop crashing head on into the cold hard cement,
Each perfect shape,
Splintering into a million pieces,
Piercing the skin on my cold body.
Only then,
I seem to hear the magnificent concerto of a million drops of perfection
Crashing.
I shut those eyes of mine,
And let those tears drown my face,
And I listen to the rhythm of the drops crashing down.

Faces, a flurry of faces,
each coming into focus on it's own time.
Those lips of yours,
They seem to be moving,
They seem to be saying something.
But somehow, I can' t seem to hear anything
Rather I seem to hear everything else.
I am an empty drain.

I am porcelain.
Snow-white porcelain.
I am broken.
Pieces of me,
splayed out, beautifully.

The 5 minute Ramble

2008-02-20T22:04:00.003+08:00

1. I need to take 3 shots TMR FOR SOUTH AFRICA AHHHH
2. Really enjoyed going back to RJ (totally disregarding the TRUE purpose of selling Fun-O-Rama tickets), and seeing the people, Sianying, Joo, Qing, and many many more was really quite nice. Gosh I realised how much I miss those guys.
3. 4 dances for South Africa DOWN.
4. Whee hee hee got back DEP IS Prelim results, math test results and econs test results yayness (:
5. REHEARSALS HAVE STOPPED FOR TERMS. REST, BOOKS!
6. DO NOT FREAK OUT FOR INJECTIONS TMR
7. Founder's day rehearsal, er court shoes! I tied for DEP Book Prize with les how cute is that.
Scholastic Merit wooo, im A SCHOLAR DONT BELIEVE ME NAH.
8. Today was 'Hobbling Down The Stairs Day' thanks to the 100-squat saga in warm-ups on monday. I'm surprised how I managed not to scream during Bhangra today.
9. PACK PACK PACK for South Africa!
10. Equipment list for SA - PLEASE REMEMBER
11. REMAIN ALIVE FOR THE NEXT MONTH. AND YEAR IF POSSIBLE.

Those Were The Days, This Is The Love!

2008-02-14T22:02:00.006+08:00

here's in the spirit of VALENTINE'S -

Valentine, O, Valentine,
I'll be your love, and you'll be mine,
We'll care for each other, rain or fine,
and in 90 years we'll be 99.

Here We Go Again Amigos!

2008-02-13T21:48:00.006+08:00

m13 dinner outing@ holland v

Right now I just ate my dinner after getting home from Pride and Prejudice text and dance, have a math test tmr, IS templete due supposedly today, Club fees to collate, IS Prelims on SUNDAY AH, class Fun-O-Rama fund raising tmr, chu's and jas's IS consults tmr ( I swear I love my IS combi, my blatantly straight forward Singaporean piece, Chu's 'CATS' Macavity wheee I get to be a cat, and a dead emo Holocaust body flopping around)

And with that I must say I love my friends our comm, MY IS PARTNERS SUU AND MARKKIEE, LES I MISSED YOU EARLIER IN THE DAY WHEN YOU WERE HAVING AN INTIMATE DATE WITH THE TOILET BOWL, CHUUUUU I LUBBBBCHUUUU, DHE TRUSTY MATH BUDDY, JAS LOVELY PERSON ALWAYS WATCHING OUT FOR ME, nick thanks for treating me again (I swear something's wrong with that boy these few days), MAO HUI for your black rose lol, yelyn ed for all DA LOVE, ROXXXXX FOR BEING SUCH A GREAT FRIEND, schwaaaa for i have no idea why since she keeps suaning me but well i still love you, J1s for i absolutely adore you guys, kester for being a joke AND AND I LOVE MY ROLE IN P&P WAHA, AND AND I AM ABSOLUTELY INCOHERENT AND YESTERDAYS BHANGRA WAS ONE HELLA FUN AND FATIGUE.

OK NOW BACK TO WORKKKKKK.

AND PLEASE VISIT acsiantheatre.com

JANUARY IS ALMOST OVER.

2008-01-29T00:40:00.000+08:00

Running around the whole day with lesson after lecture, consult after consult after consult after PE after rehearsal after undone homework after scripts after scripts to memorise. To think it'll all be over hella soon and we'll be rotting at home in that couch wondering what to do for the next hour.

But right now some more months to go. One by one by one, strike. AND I NEED TO SLEEP BEFORE I KILL MYSELF GRR.

But I realise its nice to let steam off in incoherent string of words. OH THE DEPRAVITY AND SUAVITY AND INDULGENCE.

SAVE ME FROM MY OWN INSANITY PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME NOW.

I will survive this week. Just till FRIDAY for now. (which is Econs test day and H3 Lit Proposal due day and SYF showcase day)

Much love, Goodnight World.

Landing On Your Feet Is One Thing, Doing It Right Is Another.

2008-01-24T22:43:00.000+08:00

I'm possibly been executing too many acrobatic stunts in my life. It does make life pretty spectacular, those shoddy to brilliant saves I make just before I crash and hit the ground head-first. And what's life without spectacle.

Problem is I pull these stints one to often perhaps, and I forget about the time I nearly smashed my brains out in 2 days and start manouvering into one again, a nice finish maybe but still. I still nearly smashed my head. Almost everytime.

If I wasn't for the goodwill and love of the people around me, I would not be so undeservingly lucky. Thanks to you and you and you, blood has yet to be shed too spectacularly. Now that would be a spectacle.

Up That Hill Once Again.

2008-01-24T19:09:00.000+08:00

The huge boulder of a rock rolls down the hill.

Inch by inch, foot by foot, toe by flattened toe,

You push the rock up the hill.

The huge boulder of a rock rolls down the hill.

Inch by inch, foot by foot, toe by flattened toe,

You push the rock up the hill.

The huge boulder of a rock rolls down the hill.

Inch by inch, foot by foot, toe by flattened toe,

You push the rock up that hill.

Woo.

2008-01-20T10:48:00.000+08:00

Hi There. I haven't posted in about a month now, so here's explaining why I am back today; feeling horrible and sickly and groggy = stuck in bed. ALL JASMIN'S FAULT (a.k.a. the hotbed of germs that has infected half of all the drama kids)

The new school year has started for 3 weeks already and there's no slowing down with TERMS in 4 weeks, SYF showcase in 2 , DEP IS Prelims in 3, yada yada. But all's well and dandy and no one has broken down yet thankfully, except for this tiny invasion of the virus that has rendered me out of commision for two days.

The new ickle J1s are also in, and so far they have been really likeable, not one bit irritating no. AND aha! I am no longer the only RGS girl in AC now, 2 more had the mind and the guts to transfer here this year. Whee.

Also met up with fang a few days back to stuff ourselves silly again so that was nice.

Too much has happened in a month and 2 days so here's some food for thought;

I ate a ton of sugar.
It made me very sweet.
It also made me very round—
now I can’t find my feet.

Filler.

2007-12-18T13:38:00.001+08:00

now you know what you have missed all you people who didn't go for Arabian Nights. lol. guess which one i am and win a prize. ha.

Alive and Kicking

2007-11-30T23:40:00.001+08:00

Just got back from FINISHING ARABIAN NIGHTS, AND VIETNAM and will be to japan tmr afternoon, hence explaining the lack fo life in this humble abode.

AN was a blast, excellent bonding experience. It really was a great production (:

Vietnam in Ho Chi Minh was a very tourist-y relaxed experience with us pampered princesses and princes (as christened by our tour guide) being ferried around, well-fed, well-dressed and well rested. Spent money like water in USD, slept like logs in the bus, ate many spring rolls and rice paper.

On a different note, I also just got back from my uncle's funeral. He died of a unexpected heart attack in America a week ago. Life really is just so fragile, just one simple tap and the frail glass shatters. He left his 2 boys, one in AC J2, one in NUS year 2, and his wife.

It was quite a surreal, yet, generic family occasion, one of the times like at new year or birthdays where my mother's side of the family gathers. Her 4 siblings, my grandparents and my numerous big and small cousins. As I approached the tent, one of those typical Singaporean funerals at the void deck of the HDB flat, I didn't know quite how to act, o react, or feel for that matter. I was never very close to my uncle, but close enough by normal cordial relative status. I picked up the joss stick my father passed to me, its sweet spicy familiar smell lightly wafting. The 2 brothers waited beside us as guardians of the body, of hosts, of the closest family members.

My daddy asked if we wanted to see the body, one of my other sister didn't want to. I decided that I should, that there should be nothing to be afraid of or nothing to be awkward about. Looking into the clear part of the coffin glass, I saw a face familiar, yet by miles distant. It was clearly my uncle, but the lack of life was stark and the thick make-up unnatural. The red tie and the suit seemed a little suffocating, as ironic as it may be, and he didn't quite look like himself but rather over-dressed almost as if a puppet doll. Like those puppets in Vietnamese water puppetry, with white painted faces.

Yet it was neither sickening nor nauseating nor uneasy. It was just, as is.

There was no incessant dramatic sobbing, or kneeling and chanting, and everyone was just chatting normally about everyday stuff, like my trip to vietnam. Many of us were folding the papaer money into ingot shapes to be burnt for my uncle. Those stacks of thin printed paper money went on and on and my sister was there folding since 1 in the afternoon.

My parents went to pick of the Thai Buddhist monks that were here to do the prayer for my uncle. 4 yellow clad monks arrived and a couple of straw mats were laid out in front of the coffin tent while the monks sat at the side. My aunty, the 2 boys, my 2 cousins around my age, my other uncle and us 3 sisters sat on the mat and waited.

The monks asked to be served tea which had been prepared, and I almost got up to get the tea for them when my cousin nicely snapped that girls can't serve the tea. The feminist in me geared up a little as it was clear the monks asserted the authority of the males and the men, pointing out my uncle to lead us in the kneeling and the bowing.

What is the aim of prayer?
To lift the soul to a calm place.

As the monks chanted prayers we sat on the ground with our heads bowed and my mind wandered into the realm of questioning faith, belief and religion. As my mind floated in the hypnotic and calming rhythm of the prayers, I realised that the reason I have remained agnostic is that despite all the great values and qualities I see in each religion, there is somehow something that doesn't quite click with my way of thinking.

As the chants went on, I realised I could not understand a word of the chants, nor did I much appreciate the gender inequality inherent. And yet the humble quiet way of the monks, and the simple yet earnest session was calming. Immersed in a christian environment in school, I really appreciate how every act or effort is not done as means to an end, but is reflected upon, done in the glory of a higher being and is appreciated and thanked. The forgiving and supportive community structure is also immensely loving. And yet, I can't seem to speak to this illustrious God, the idea of having to subscribe to a faith (by a certain few) to be saved and to earn a place in eternal heaven as means to an end, does not go down quite well with me.

I believe each and every religion or faith has its historic and factual roots in some point of civilisation and culture, and I truly believe that it is inherent in humanity to look to a higher being other than oneself, a greater purpose and meaning in life. That one doesn't just live and die for nothing for other than the most utilitarian of purposes. Cultures have looked up to everything from the Sun, to the Moon, the animals in almost every aspect in thanksgiving, praise and spiritual pursuit. Each religion, faith or belief, no matter how pure its intent is a crucial social and cultural construct, just as how society and culture influences the basis and the pratice of faith and religion. And as there are flaws in every human construct, I believe no religion or faith is perfect, as is everything in the earthly abode, but more importantly I am torn in subscribing to one God or one faith for I believe none of them are truly, 'true'. For no one can look into what happens after death, and no living man can testify to the concrete prescence of that one God in the form which he or she claims.

But yet no I am not saying that what you can't see doesn't exist, I do believe that a higher being, a greater spirit, in whatever form NEEDS to exist. But I don't see why I need to be torn and choose to subscribe a particular one. For all we know, none of the forms of God we humans claim are true, for all we know all forms we claim are in fact one, for all we know all of them are true to some extent and it is culture and society which distorts its original form.

God is for all of us, is everywhere, and perhaps does not need to fall into a tangible form.

What is true to each individual in the spirit is what one honestly and whole-heartedly believes to be the truth. And that is why I honestly respect each steadfast and devout Christian, the friends around me.

And here ends my verbal vomit in its coarse and unpolished form.

cheers and goodnights.

More Cam-whoring

2007-11-16T19:55:00.001+08:00

CPA Gala Dinner Drama-dancers!

I'm the one the other way round yes. Frances the diva in the middle as usual. (:

nicholas ngo in a skirt he put on himself. he did. he always does.

now this is the way it is. the girls are the strong men whee.

Our star boys. Sigh.

*ALL PHOTOS COURTESY OF BEV'S AND GABBY'S BLOGS (:

After 4 days of climbing poles, walking tightropes, vertical drops, being carried through tiny holes, cheering and waking up at 2.30 to change 4 times

2007-11-12T12:13:00.001+08:00

BADEN-POWELL CCAAB 07'

BP GIRLS (:

BP BOYS

Maryn's big --- heh.

Now this is the AC spirit. Ha.

Mr Lau dancing with me. Les, you jealous? HEH. (joanne chin somehow still looks good in that weird position.)

ME AND JAS. and yes you can't see my eyes fine.

DHE THE PIMP.
ACSIAN THEATRE UNITE (:

Tralala

2007-11-07T22:19:00.000+08:00

culmination of lovely emo songs stolen from fang's blog. cheesy but great nonetheless.

I'M BACK FROM CCAAB. I shall elaborate on experiences another day, very lazy and tired now.

Just had dinner with Fang and friend Daniel, ICE CREAMMMMM MMMM. Good happy times.

REFEARSALS REHEARSALS BACK TO REALITY AFTER CAMP. MEMORISE, H3 PROPOSAL, A PROPER MEANINGFUL POST.

I going to bum around now. Till my sanity and coherence returns, Goodnight World. (:

Pack, Memorise (CHANT WITH ME)

2007-11-01T11:03:00.000+08:00

PW IS OVER WAHA. ALL ACADEMIC RESPONSIBILTIES AT A VERY SHORT-LIVED HALT YEAH.

CCAB camp tmr, I may not seem particularly excited, but I never minded camps and all, it should be fun. I'll only get in the mood when I reach wherever we are camping whee. Packing is 3/4 done, a feat for miss procrastinator here, I started this morning to find I have no insect repellant, sunblock and sleeping bag (after getting Jas to send me the packing list which I lost, obviously ha). But this will all rectify itself in a while.

MEMORISE SCRIPT YES. 2 WEEKS TO SHOW. YES. SELL MORE TICKETS YES.

it is 3.13 now. rehearsal at 5. better reach by 4.45. nap for an hour. 4.13 to 4.40 memorise script.
I've got a stock of yohgurt and ICE CREAM in my freezer I should finish before going off into the wilderness as well. Today is a good day. Waha, I'm bulking up. Storing fats for the camp. Heh.

I'm not quite making sense, but I suppose I wanted to lighten the mood of this place a bit, since Schwa dear has commented my blog is getting emo (though in my opinion I find it pretty hopeful indeed)

Life's smooth sailing, No imminent emotional or physological (I CANT SPELL) problems or troubles or pains, I have friends (albeit those who love to make fun of me at every chance), I have good food (NO I AM NOT GOING TO SPILL OVER MY COSTUME, I AM LOVE MADE PERFECT LOL)

AHH napping time ticking away.

Goodnight world.

P.S. Beams.

Defying Gravity With A Can I Heptch You?

2007-10-24T22:09:00.000+08:00

Shit happens.

But we all have to just get through it don't we all, lift our chins up high, pull up our socks (or stockings or garter belts) and face the world with all its bright glaring lights. Toss away self-anger and blame, take a drowsy hot shower, and look further into the world lay before our feet.

Thanks Jas, Ed for all the encouragement that works as strongly as energy fluid pumped straight into my heart, Sarah, Jen, June, Yelyn, Mark for words of comfort, Dhe for your energy and focus that's infectious, Caleb for being a great boy and helping out with the sticky (literally) cremo machine, Rox for your hugs and concern, and Les who has always been there no matter what and forever the greatest listening ear. Thank you sooo much for sending me home on that day when I was feeling low, it was one of the simplest yet nicest gestures and you really don't know how much it meant to me. Thanks Nick for sending me home with Les as well boy (even though it was probably more for 'er-hem' than me but thanks for offering it really (:)

I need a full day of slacking and having absolutely nothing to do but laze and laze more. I need that one day of reprive to recharge. I need to clear everything off my mind and just, do nothing. And not have to worry about PW OP, comm matters, studies, script memorising, dance steps revision, IS storyboarding and not feel too guilty about it. But well it doesn't seem quite possible now that even Sundays, my usual day of nothing-ness, is taken up by cha cha. And before I get a chance to meditate and breathe, Monday starts and here-we-go-again.

Breathe girl, and just breathe.

Just a few more weeks to pull through and off we fly off to Vietnam and Japan.

OK I MIGHT AS WELL DO MY TO-DO LIST HERE:

1. PW OP script (5 mins worth COME ON) THURS
2. IS storyboarding (still can't decide on the song and how to develop a plot around it, too many ideas) THURS - FRI latest
3. Remember to bug club for South Africa interest forms
4. Type out promo lit essay which got an A for Mr Tanu THURS
5. Sell more Arabian Nights tickets THEATRE WEEK
6. Comm self-evaluation
7. H3 Lit Research and initial proposal 9 NOV (which is CPA Gala Dinner as well)

Breathe, breathe.

PULL UP SOCKS AND GET LIFE IN ORDER.

My only saving grace is possibly that I cleared promos pretty okay. All other things need to tighten the strings and oil my cogs.

WOO HOO WE CAN DO THIS ARGH.

Prrr.

2007-10-15T22:07:00.001+08:00

There are indeed many thoughts running through my head at this moment. Some doubt, some pressure, some resignation, some exhilaration, some hope. I'm too tired to elaborate but here's what everything's going to culminate to eventually...

one thousand and one nights
A night of story-telling, colour, dance and song.

22, 23, 24 NOV (Thurs, Fri, Sat)
$25

24 NOV Matinee Show
$20

Anglo-Chinese School (Barker)
Tan Cheng Siong Drama Theatre

GET TICKETS NOW.

Bom Bom Bom.

2007-10-08T21:37:00.000+08:00

Promos are long over. Too long for my selective amnesia that is. Whee.

Been lunching, walking in moonlight, cha cha-ing and shopping with great company and am experiencing a great sense of well-being.

Some uncanny unexpected occurances (HAHA), some health hazards, some reading.

And now its time to get Back In Black and start slogging towards a flat-toned stomach, dancing proficency and hip shaking ability, speech fluidity and upcoming mad-sequin sewing.

And there's looming rock-climbing, open fire cooking, high flying stunts and exhilaration(?) leading towards a high gloss night of well-earned glamour.

And then its one more long FUN filled mind-boggling acrobatic year bound to be full of tumbles and turns, balance and precison.

Bom.

More Men-Trampling,

2007-10-04T23:29:00.000+08:00

love-hate, says:
arent we all. men cannot be trusted. and loved. hmph.
they deserve to DIE.

♥ ling How To Stop An Exploding Man, says:
YES THEY DOOO
DIE MEN
TRAMPLES

love-hate, says:
i trample along with you. we trample HARD. we're not going to let them live. NEVER.
die men die.
DIE.

♥ ling How To Stop An Exploding Man, says:
DIE DIE DIE

love-hate, says:
with reference to your nickname. all men should just explode. haha we shant stop them. (i'm reading it in all the wrong context arent i.)

♥ ling How To Stop An Exploding Man, says:
HAHAHA YES
ok this is once again going on my blog
and after that i shall go sleep

love-hate, says:
HAHA. blogger!
i'm going to be famous thanks to you.
all these conversations.
i should censor myself a bit more when i'm talking to you on msn.
ahaha.

Its Sia Shu Qing Lesley again.

How To Stop An Exploding Man.

2007-10-04T19:32:00.000+08:00

Where does it come from, this quest, this need to solve life's mysteries, when the simplest of questions cannot be answered. Why are we here? What is the soul? Why do we dream?
Perhaps we would be better off not looking at all, not delving, not yearning.

But that is not human nature, not the human heart, that is not why we are here.

Yet still we struggle to make a difference, to change the world. To dream of hope, never knowing for certain who we will meet along the way, Who among the world of strangers will hold our hand, touch our hearts, and share the pain of trying.

So much struggle for meaning, for purpose, and in the end, we find it only in each other. Our shared experience of the fantastic, and the mundane.

The simple human need to find a kindred, to connect and to know in our hearts, that we are not alone.

-excerpt from Heroes,
stolen from derek's blog-

And so we continue searching, delving, unabashedly yearning, flinging ourselves willingly into life's way. And unabashedly I lift my deviant chin, stare straight into those steely eyes, in hope that I may one day melt that glare with sub-zero temperatures and delve into the warmth beneath. And stop myself from exploding.

I Love It When You Call, I Love It When You Call, I Love It When You Call, But You Never Call At All.

---

1 more paper to FREEDOM.

I Am Addicted To This When I Really Should Seriously Be Reading My Brave New World!

2007-10-04T17:39:00.000+08:00

Your Dosha is Pitta

You have a quick mind, a gift for persuasion, and a sharp sense of humor.
You have both the drive and people skills to be a very successful leader.
Argumentative and a bit stubborn, you have been known to be a little too set in your ways.
But while you may be biased toward your own point of view, you are always honest, fair, and ethical.

With friends: You are outgoing and open to anyone who might want to talk to you

In love: You are picky but passionate

To achieve more balance: Be less judgmental of those around you, and take cool walks in the moonlight.

What's Your Dosha?

Ommmm.

Your Inner Pop Princess Is Beyonce

"Tonight I'll be your naughty girl

I'm callin all my girls

Gonna turn this party out

I know you want my body."

You've got the talent, looks, and attitude to get to the top of the charts.

Who's Your Inner Pop Princess?

To the left to the left, (:

You Are a Bright Star Soul

Like a shining star, you have no trouble being the center of attention
In fact, you often feel a bit hurt when all eyes aren't on you
You need to be number one in everything, no matter how trivial
And it's this ego that both hurts your confidence and helps you acheive

You're dramatic and a powerhouse of pure energy
You posess a divine quality or uniqueness that's hard to define
A natural performer, it's likely you'll become famous in some circles.
Just learn not to take everyone's reaction to you so personally!

Souls you are most compatible with: Newborn Soul and Prophet Soul

What Kind of Soul Are You?

Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket, never let it fade away,

Your Luck Quotient: 80%

You have a high luck quotient.
More often than not, you've felt very lucky in your life.
You may be randomly lucky, but it's probably more than that.
Optimistic and open minded, you take advantage of all the luck that comes your way.

How Lucky Are You?

Lucky Bunny,

You Are More Yang

Masculine
Creative
Angry
Spring
Summer
Morning
Sun
Space
Active
Wood
Chocolate

Are You More Yin or Yang?

YEAH BABY.

Your Theme Song is Back in Black by AC/DC

"Back in black, I hit the sack,
I've been too long, I'm glad to be back"

Things sometimes get really crazy for you, and sometimes you have to get away from all the chaos.
But each time you stage your comeback, it's even better than the last!

What's Your Theme Song?

How apt. We're gonna be back in blacks very often very soon.

Your Candy Heart Says "Hug Me"

A total sweetheart, you always have a lot of love to give out.
Your heart is open to where ever love takes you!

Your ideal Valentine's Day date: a surprise romantic evening that you've planned out

Your flirting style: lots of listening and talking

What turns you off: fighting and conflict

Why you're hot: you're fearless about falling in love

What Does Your Candy Heart Say?

HUG ME.

OK ENOUGH STOP BRAVE NEW WORLD.

Cause A Train Wreck, And Then Put Me In The Traction,

2007-09-30T22:38:00.001+08:00

CHEONG CHEONG CHEONG.

Its worrying that I am not quite one bit too wound up or stressed. Or perhaps not. (:

Here's a little senseless something to wind our wound up minds around-

Well in every complicated situation
There's a human relation
To make sense of it all
Take a whole lot of concentration
Well you can't blame her baby
For her pregnant ma
And if there's one of these
On her auto applause

2007-09-30T16:53:00.000+08:00

Adj.

unloved - not loved

unwanted - not wanted; not needed; "tried to give away unwanted kittens"

loved - held dear; "his loved companion of many years"

Grah?

2007-09-27T20:06:00.000+08:00

Not the best exam strategy to be falling sick he day before the start of the whole promo saga.

Pump pump pump fluids down,
Pray pray pray tell me I'll feel better tomorrow morning.

When The Moon Hits Your Eye Like A Big Pizza Pie,

2007-09-26T22:49:00.001+08:00

Mr. Moon up there is really really round and bright tonight. And if you look carefully enough you can honestly spot the rabbit up there, its two ears and round bob of a tail.

And its quite a romantic notion that everyone across the globe is looking up to that same moon.

I ORDER YOU GO LOOK AT THE MOON NOW.

YUE LIANG DAI BIAO WO DI XIN.

Go grab a glipse of my heart,
With that industrious rabbit within.

I really do hope you are looking up at the same moon as me.
Despite anything and everything.
At least we are looking at the same moon are we not?

Whee. Nonsense.

Self-Assertion 101

2007-09-19T22:58:00.000+08:00

Learning from the revolutionaries of 1918 China,

♥ ling Taylor, The Latte Boy, says:
haha, i have a feeling its gonna take a while too
let's just hope we wont have to wait till our teeth drop out
i'll be content
:D

love, look away. says:
till our teeth drop out. that'll be quite sad. but if it's destined that i should remain a lonely spinster...
haha!

♥ ling Taylor, The Latte Boy, says:
oh gosh golden child
NONE OF MY DAUGHTERS ARE GOING TO END UP LONELY SPINSTERS
there is a WHOOLLLEEE generation of MEENNN who would want an educated wife!
you're educated!
(:

love, look away. says:
ooh yay! and so are you!
haha!

♥ ling Taylor, The Latte Boy, says:
that proves..
that we will not end up lonely spinsters!!
HUZZAH

love, look away. says:
WOOHOO! life suddenly seems so much better and the future so much brighter.
there is hope yet.

♥ ling Taylor, The Latte Boy, says:
indeed
the future is thus bright

love, look away. says:
YAY! i really feel like...WOW. my life suddenly has purpose you know? it feels...good.
hahahahahha

We sound like desperate middle-aged women. Yes, its Les.

If I Lay Here, If I Just Lay Here,

2007-09-17T21:04:00.000+08:00

Would you lie with me and just forget the world.

The night sky over the field was littered with clouds, forming a fluffy vortex over us lying on our backs. The glowing crescent moon was over to the left, cushioned by soft cottony clouds. We made out all sorts of objects from the assortment of fluff in the greyish dark sky of the early night. An angsana seed, the lion king cub, a star. The stars were veiled unlike the other time. And the grass on which our backs lay on was cool and soft.

And we poke fun at Rox, and she screams as I throw grass on her. And her cries of exasperation to Disha's pokes and squaks, as well as to my singing. And I wave to the planes that past.

If I lay here, If I just lay here,
Taylor, the latte boy,
The dawn is breaking,
I somehow find, you and I collide,
Round one,
I can hear the bells,

Ran a round around the track, (Dish goes : 'J1 only, sighhhh') and realised I'm really quite out of shape. And we watch Beth spin around the field.

A row of 2 J1s and 2 J2s lying in a line on the field must have been quite a sight.

And breathe, just breathe,

I like just leaving the world behind and soaking in the moments of ... tranquil bliss. With peals of hearty laughter and the letting go of the worn-down facade of everyday existence. Not that I have much of a facade, I'm as silly in the day as in the night, but, you get what I mean.

Going on a trip to mars. And claiming the clouds as my own.

And its not quite so hard to see the fixation over the sky, its beauty, the wonders it holds, the endlessness.

The world is forgotten, worries left behind.

Sweet dreams till sunbeams find you,
Sweet dreams and leave your worries behind you,

There's A Fly In My Cup And I Can't Drink My Water,

2007-09-15T23:43:00.001+08:00

Mr Woolhead's Band! (:

Had another enjoyable night. (:

Escaped during intermission of the performance on Friday, which had excellent dance sequences and costumes (the lead dancer was not human really) but had lacklustre acting sadly.

HOPPED DOWN to esplanade outdoor theatre at the waterfront and watched MR WOOLHEAD and his celtic band. Music was goooood (I loved the flute and violin), company was excellent (Frances and her very audible hooting) and WERE WE HIGH. Had quite a lot of fun dancing scottish round-abouts in the gravel. Sarah is a violent dancer.

Emo cam-whoring at the bay after and had supper at lau pa sat with chu's family. My second time hmm. (Please refer to chu's lj for visual stimuli)

After a day of exasperation trying very hard to find someone to take Dewei's ticket for the Swing Dance workshop at the esplanade, finally Dharsh agreed to attend it with me. My first brush with formal partner dancing. Very enjoyable session.

Again we headed down to the outdoor theatre for another band performance with June. I had watched that band play before... a year back at the esplanade too.

Andddddd BINGE EATING. Satay, char kuay, ice kachang. Heaven. And then we crash back down to earth with flabby tummies.

WHY WHY WHY I don't get why they demolished the old outdoor theatre with the view of the whole bay. Hmph.

Trips down to esplanade at night, with that wonderful bayside breeze, good heart-thumping feet crackling body jiggling music and excellent company, what more could one ask for? (;

Its a funny sensation when the bass of the speakers thump so loud that your heart beats in unison with the tremor.

Strum my heartstrings,
Make it tremble.

Dreams, Dreams, Dreams.

2007-09-13T21:09:00.000+08:00

'Dreams are today's answers to tomorrow's questions.
Dreams are illustrations... from the book your soul is writing about you.'

Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream
Make him the cutest that I've ever seen
Give him two lips like roses and clover
Then tell him that his lonesome nights are over

Sandman, I'm so alone
Don't have nobody to call my own
Please turn on your magic beam
Mr. Sandman bring me a dream

HERE'S A BEEEEGGG HUG TO YOU.

2007-09-12T23:33:00.000+08:00

To Mark,
Thank you for being my walking bolster which -gasp- gives off heat (very important and essential) and is portable (comes with automated travel) and for being my hand to hold and face to squish.

To all the JO- people,
Thank you guys for perpetually spamming my tagboard with random comments. Thank you 2 buggers for supporting everything. Thank you Josh for just always being there. Yes, i may dao you very often but its only because I know you'll always be there. Loves.

To Rox,
Thanks for being my study/sleeping partner for the past few days. Lets hope future sessions will be even more fruitful. Woo Hoo. And you know I make you smile and feel retarded.

To Les,
For being stuck with me for the next year and few months every single waking day. Or at least school day. And for letting me leech off your resources. And for putting up with my rubbish. (:

To Fang,
A bit belated, but thank you for coming for Inventio and giving me the photograph of 410. Yes, thank you for having to be stuck with me for 4 years, and yes lets go do something crazy again soon. I LOVE YOU. I KNOW YOU LOVE ME TO. I still love hugs yes.

Voulez-vous danser avec moi?

---

Did I mention how i looovvveeeee cityhall and clarke quay area? I just adorrreee walking along and I could possibly go on walking for hours with good company. I need more good company. To do silly things like walk through the water fountains and squeeze through the pillars. Although Mark and Isaac make excellent walking partners. A bit of romance would be nice, but I suppose that can and would have to wait.

And to put it plainly and simply, there is still someone, but me is perfectly fine (i hope) with things as the way they are. No use for any agonising, had enough of it previously to realise nothing is ever as dramatic or hopeless as one can make it out to be in the heat of emotion. I think that episode was almost like an immunisation. WHAT DOESN'T KILL YOU ONLY MAKES YOU STRINGER (manly growl) Oh darn, my stomach is growling AUDIBLY.

Ah life is as such, and what more can one ask for? (:

Que Sera Sera.

I had better not apply that principle to my promos though. Gosh.

Enough rambling, TIME TO SLEEP. AND I SHALL NOT THINK TOO MUCH NOW.

For All The Times We Need The Strength.

2007-09-09T17:12:00.000+08:00

Just Remember

To whom are troubled,
Weary, anxious and down,
Remember that there're
The Beloved, to flip up your frown.
Hold your head up
And with confidence, walk strong.
'Cos you'll always
have us - friends - to help you along.

Friends who will be:

Your shoes to protect you when you dance;
Your support in your dreams to perform in France;
Your ear plugs to keep out the bitchings and noise;
Your friends and companions when you play with your toys;
Your cash and your date, when you're out for the night;
Your pillow and blanket to help you sleep tight;
Your tissue to wipe and dry up your tears;
Your mother who pats you to calm out your fears;
Your punch-bag for anger, your fury, your rage;
Your walking stick; your brace as you age;
Your journal and pen to keep all your thoughts;
Your tingling sensations that won't be forgot.

So remember. Look to your right
and you'll see the family you've got.
Look up in the sky
and you have the loving God.
Look straight ahead
and see your life stretched out before.
Look to your left
and see friends, fellowship and more.
Look onward back
and your past it shows how to be strong.

Remember the
people who'll help you along.

- MARK CHENG CHUN YEONG-

So Many Things To Say,

2007-09-07T22:45:00.000+08:00

RAE'S FAREWELL LUNCH

what you looking at eh?

omg tushar. we had to tiptoe will aini had to bend down to get this height conformity.

don't ask. and who's that at the back? haha.

tushar, RAEEE, henryk(HA), krit, weiyi.

oh the romance.

aftermath of the scandal.

charlie's angels?

schwa looks as if she's gonna punch someone.

goodbye SIR.

---

Its been a week filled with moments. Moments that got the cog in my heart whirring and chugging.

Moments with my Inventio group.

Yes, we may not be as ra-ra as TBIGE(hahahahaa we love you guys), but we defintely had something working my darlings. Thank you Deweiiii for being our slave driver, Lesley for being as sweet as you are and as commited as you are, Schwa for providing the MANLINESS to our group (despite being in a pink cheongsam), Jen for being so sweet and focused and willing to give, Zhi Peng for growing immensely and opening up.

Moments of sour revelation.

Moments of unexpected proportions.

Hi derek. It was nice seeing you again too. Don't forsake passion, don't let life get you down. I haven't. So there's no reason why you should. Get the DSLR if you can, it takes beautiful pictures, and you can carry it with you for life, and you can carry the moments you capture with you for life as well. If I remember one of my last words (haha last words) to you were... wishing you all the best in what you endeavour upon. And that still stands as my biggest wish for you. As I said, the next time I see you and ask you how are you, you had better not reply 'terribly' again. Haha, not as if you'll read this. (Really now?) (:

Thoughts are running through my head like those lost souls in that fishbowl. Swimming round and round in a large swirl. Twirling and swirling. And my train of thought is lost.

Moments of ... reflection.

Open House was not an absolute disaster, but it was a bit of a scramble, and had numerous glitches on the part of our comm. I need to get my act up and set a better example. Also need to get more used to the idea of authority and the need to be firm, well-informed and more well-oiled as a whole comm. We have a very potentially strong team, we all love each other SO WE SHALL WORK HARD. AFTER WE ALL PASS OUR PROMOS WITH FLYING COLOUUURRSSSSS.

Jas, our most responsible PRES, thank you for everything, we shall have more lovely times with each other talking things out, and under your leaderrssshhiipppp we WILL ALL SOAR TO GREATER HEIGHTS.

Dhe, vice pres artistic, thank you for being so collected and encouraging towards the whole of ACSian theatre.

Les, our SEXY secretary, my beloved friend, classmate and person whom i literally see the most of every single day, thank you for being as meticulous and neat as you are. I'm forever borrowing things from you and not returning them I APOLOGISE, but thank you for not lynching me for that.

ED, thank you for being as loud and anal as you are and for being so stead fast and absolutely consistent as a performer and a comm member. Thank you for managing all our DARN MESSAGING SYSTEM (we really should get that free sms line thingy), and forever complaining about our dwindling credits. whee. what would we do without you.

Nick, DON'T STRESS whenever you have to do something you toot. yes but nonetheless thank you for slave driving us into getting the board done and for getting all our t shirt designs, poster designs done so aesthically pleasing and on task. you rock. even though none of us want to admit it. SLEEP MORE, DO YOUR WORK, STUDY and don't let mummy worry now!

Schwa-al. We love you. And I know you love me anyhow. No matter how stupid I am sometimes. Or how stupid you can be sometimes. Tralalaa.

ROXXXXX. Our beloved crew manager. Thank you for being who you are and for knowing where to get everything when we need them. And thank you for offering your friendship to me, and for knowing things and for caring. BEEEG HUGGG.

MARKIEEE POOOO. Thank you for being the silly boy you are, no matter how meeeaaaannnnnn you can get sometimes. Thank you for always supporting everyone and helping out whereever you can and for being our sexxxyyyy cast manager.

YEEEEEEEEELYN. You sexy girl, again thank you for being ever supportive and smiley and being our CREMO auntie and getting everything done and for being o extremely sweeeettt and smiley and nice. WHAHA.

JEN JEN. Thank you for being so adorabbllleee and sweet that it is soooo hard to ever reprimand you in anyway. Thank you for DOING the stuff that no one likes to touch, e.g. TICKET money and T SHIRT money. we love you. we do.

SU YEEEEEE. Our ticket auntie, thank you for your anality and eagerness to help us all out as a comm. Don't feel left out just cos your not in the performing team most of the time. It is a blessing to have someone like you to help take care of things when we all are boggled by performance.

andddd JUNEEEEEE. again thanks for being there and being such reliable help when we all are fazed by performance and running around like mad chickens. HUGGGGG.

and the j2s for always providing us with invaluable help and experience that makes things much smoother. (:

not to forget the madams, who probably worry lots more than we do, have many many more things to worry about, who are forever providing us with guidance out of obligation and possibly more than just that. it all would be nothing if not thanks to them.

vice pres admin will work harder. (:

right now, back to my econs independent learning, gp essay, lit annotation and essay outline. and oh yes, promos.

Even The Wrong Words Seem To Rhyme.

2007-09-04T22:10:00.000+08:00

Over-compensation for my dire need for self-assertion,
An illusive self-consciousness constantly engaged in self-combat,
Misunderstanding,
Insensitivity,
Awareness.

I get it.
Just don't hate me for it.
Forgive me,
Nudge me.

You just might be suprised how receptive I am to criticism.

And that under the frou-frou I sometimes like to flair,
There really isn't much to me.

Simple and highly predictable.

Why Life Is Sad.

2007-09-01T22:36:00.001+08:00

1. I Have No Friends
2. I Have No Life
3. I Am Hungry
4. Skin Is In Bad Condition
5. Exams Are Coming And I Have Not Started Studying

Then again, I'm still here.

Ignore This Random Ranting.

SMILE.

It's Oh So Quiet.

2007-08-26T13:14:00.000+08:00

whoosh. and 8 months of the year has past by in a sweeping flash. Pace of school life has only been on a steep rise and with almost no rest we've raced to this point.

The next few weeks will be a killer with Inventio, Arabian Nights text and dance, Open House '07, IMPENDING PROMOS (i.e. homework and revisiiiooonnnnn). And after that it'll be into full swing for Arabian Nights.

Its definitely been a steep and intense learning curve, but all the more oddly satisfying. And there's no need to worry about me drying up or breaking down, because lazy me will take whatever opportunity I can to catch my breath, sleep and stone. Right now would be an excellent example. Even though I really should be doing my Agamemnon reflections, character profiling for Inventio etc etc. But despite all this I always seem to pass up my work on time in the end, without suffering too much loss of sleep.

I hope this cycle continues to work for me as I have to face my first year-end exam in years. Uh huh, in RGS we worked topically, each assessment only covering a few topics each. Lovely RP. It's been a long while since I needed to consolidate all my learning of the year or years. Lit doesn't bother me, its progressive learning that doesn't work topically. Econs isn't too bad, topics are built up on one another. The thing that sort of worries me is MATTHHHH. yes oh glorious math. It doesn't help that I really don't see much point in math. I have managed to pass okay so far, but. grah.

The humanities scholarship which I am not keen on losing also hangs in the balance. I possibly need all Bs and above. maybe one C here or there but. AHHHHHHHH. Terms was an A, C, C, D, E.

Oh, the practicality of life. Which reminds me, I should register for SATs soon.

A world of dew,
and within every dewdrop
a world of struggle.

And I Wonder What Life Has In Store For Me.

2007-08-21T21:59:00.000+08:00

And here I am sitting here. Lamenting about nothing.
Apprehensive, anticipating, hopeful, empty.

The stars are not wanted now: put out every one;
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood.
For nothing now can ever come to any good.

A second stops to take a breath,
Some say angels are passing over head.

Rainy Days And Mondays Always Get Me Down.

2007-08-19T11:54:00.000+08:00

泪雨

天空又在哭泣,
泪洒满地.
无怨无悔的回忆
抱在怀里，放弃.
烙在地面的泪迹
只能随着雨，流离.
我的心，也跟着滴.

-ling

We're Just Ordinary People.

2007-08-18T23:24:00.000+08:00

People

Some people talk and talk
and never say a thing.
Some people look at you
and birds begin to sing.

Some people laugh and laugh
and yet you want to cry.
Some people touch your hand
and music fills the sky.

- Charlotte Zolotow

I've Got Loverrllyy Bunch Of Coconuts.

2007-08-12T21:34:00.000+08:00

yes, drawing inspiration from Mark and Jas,

WHAT I FIND BLOODY DARN SEXY. (In no particular order)

one. Long luscious hair.
(The sort I'm aiming to achieve, haha.)

two. A smooth sexxxxaaayyyyy voice
(Like Doris Day, Frank Sinatra, or Szus. And someone. Ha.)

three. A lovely stunning smile/laugh.
(Nothing beats a person postively beaming.)

four. A love for little kids.
( I swear when I see a guy playing with kids and enjoying it and looking so adorabbblleee, I melt.)

five. An immense care for others.
(Exemplified by the littlest of gestures of comfort that mean so much.)

six. A gentle touch and tender grip.
(Big lovely hands.)

seven. Slender wrists.
(Yes its super sexy. Somehow.)

eight. Yes, long sleeved shirts on guys worn the RIGHT WAY.
(No upturned collars pleaaassseee, or too many buttons unbuttoned. Please fold the sleeves to the right length. The tucking in or out matters too.)

nine. A grasp of language.
(Ahhh a man who can read, write, express and interpret. SEXY.)

ten. A Gentleman
(Who makes you feel important, significant and loved.)

eleven. Pure unadulterated passion.
(Nothing beats drive and fire, no?)

twelve. An appreciation for beauty, art and life.
(Nothing exudes sexiness like this does)

thirteen. A gaze that sees right through you.
(As if you were the ony person existant, as if there was you and only you. And a second stops and takes a breath.)

Catch A Falling Star And Put It In Your Pocket,

2007-08-11T20:13:00.000+08:00

round and round, where it stops, no one knows.

Once again, my thoughts go back to pot.

Round about in figures of 8, 9 and 10, i forgot?
Ending up in the same spot
Same ol' spot.

It's not pining, not quite, no.
It's not painful, not quite, no.
On a scale of 1 to 10...
3, 5, 7, and then?

I thought I had an epiphany that one day,
Listening to what other people had to say.
And then I thought, 'Nay.'
I think I know the difference between black, white and gray?

Once again my thoughts go back to pot.
Round about in circles
Back to the same spot.

I now know what I know and what I do not,
I think from this experience I might grow alot?

2, 4, 6 centimetres i might,
I'll get to see alot more light.
I'm quite sure I'm quite right
The difference between day and night, black to white, wrong from right?

On and on the thoughts flow, why is it so I don't know, not now please, not now, its been too long and you're too high from the ground, round and round, round and round, we all fall down.

Catch a falling star,
Wonder where you are.
Do I ever cross your sky?

Even in that wide vast blackness,
And the brilliance of the other twinkling lights,
Does that bright falling trail catch your eye?

As its white light falls out of sight,
My wish has been made.
A wish I know will probably never come true.

A moment of brilliance.

I'm Not Your Angel, Nor Your Heaven.

2007-08-10T21:12:00.000+08:00

Today was a very enjoyable day. (: Was finally able to spend time with a dear friend.

Met fang at clementi to buy groceries after a frantic message session of what we should do for the
day. How we wanted to play tennis but had no balls. How we to swim but she had no swimming suit. Swept past the aisles of NTUC buying spaggeti (oh my, i think i forgot how to spell spagetthi) noodles, pasta sauce, minced meat, mushrooms and 2 tomatoes. Yes, we were on a mission to burn my kitchen down in attempt to cook lunch for our hungry selves.

Cooking was fun, and it went very smoothly. Once again, like in sec 2 home economics, I had to take over the chopping up of the garlic. ALL TURNED OUT WELL, and it was goooood. So proud of ourselves.

We then decided that we had to go swimming. So I fished out my mother's old swimming costume which was psychedelic and neon with flowers on them. It was at least 10 years old i think. Fang ADAMANTLY refused to put it on, so i very graciously lent her my own normal-looking one and went swimming in the floral thing. I love my condo's swimming pools, their really nice and entertaining. It was like a return to our deprived childhood sliding down the slide, and giving each other imaginary tours of the pool, playing with all the water features.

I haven't swam in my pool for really long i think. Perhaps a year. Hated the hassle, getting my hair wet and chlorinated. But really, it was fun.

Finally got to do some catching up with with my dear friend in SIM now, really happy now. We really should do this more often. (;

Hey, That's No Way To Say Goodbye.

2007-08-09T14:57:00.000+08:00

HAPPY NATIONAL DAY.

Yesterday was spent at One ACS at queenstown stadium, Inventio group meeting back in school (finally, SIGNIFICANT PROGRESS), and Comm meeting at KAP. Went down to Far east with Jas, Rox and Schwa(who went on to the bookshop instead) for a while, before heading down to meet Mich Lai.

We walked all the way from Plaza Sing to the Arts House under my suggestion, looking at the most random of stuff on the way and tiring our legs out.

The plan was to watch 'Invisible City' by Tan Pin Pin. It has a limited screening there till this Sunday so go watch it! But, it was sold out for the night. We booked in advance to watch on Sunday instead. In the spirit of patriotism(yes!) and spport for the local arts scene, I do want to try to watch 881 by Royston Tan soon as well.

Mich Lai then proceeded to drag me into the weirdest of shopping complexes in along cityhall, at Peninsular and Excelsior, filled with foreign workers and the most authentic myanmese fare, shops which sell neon pink, green, yellow, and purple skinny jeans. There was actually some amount of cool stuff though.

She is forever dragging me into the weirdest places and situations. I remember her birthday treasure hunt in P5 (was it?), and trying to make a sandwich in the sand in the heaviest of rains in sentosa. And countless more.

--

There shall be fireworks today. I watched the fireworks... at least 4 times last year, at the international festival which was around the time of NDP. All of which with Alvin and co. At the Nat Day preview, at the Esplanade. At the time of a significant point in my life. I caught the fireworks by accident again this year at the Arts Fest opening, again with Alvin and Fang.

A year has passed. Now that was fast.

I still remember how I was so close to the sparks falling after they burst, it was almost as if you could feel the heat of those sparks sprinkle across your face. I remember how I was almost scared that it would burn me at first, but then realised that right before it fell into the crowds, it was all but a wisp of smoke.

I remember how each time it burst, something inside ached. An emptiness that the brilliance only served to accentuate in stark contrast. A cruel juxtaposition.

I remember how its exuberant brilliance made me smile, rather grin from ear to ear, and how I couldn't help but do so. It was as if each time the fireworks burst something ignited and melted inside my heart. God, it sounds so cliche but it was true, at least at that particular moment.

So much has changed since. But I doubt my love for the beauty of the Cityhall, Clark Quay and Esplanade area at night will ever die. I still think its one of the most beautiful places in Singapore.

Its been a year now, since I first started posting here. The first few posts were about watching the fireworks and NDP. Its come one full circle no? :)

a year in retrospect.

The Women Don't Get It.

2007-08-07T23:43:00.000+08:00

JOSH.! Watermelon juice should be drunk cold says:
the only things i'd call beautiful are buildings, cars, women
but out of the 3, cars are the most
plus it's the only category that has a brand and a model name

♥ ling I Want To Jump And Reach The Sky, And Never Fall Back Down Again. says:
well fine, marry a car then

JOSH.! Watermelon juice should be drunk cold says:
it's not considered a legal union

♥ ling I Want To Jump And Reach The Sky, And Never Fall Back Down Again. says:
-.-

JOSH.! Watermelon juice should be drunk cold says:
and it would have to depend on my cash
i'd only marry a lamborghini
or something in that league
including bugatti veyron, ford GT and pagani zonda

--

Joel says:
your friend has got his priorities right.

♥ ling I Want To Jump And Reach The Sky, And Never Fall Back Down Again. says:
sighhhhhhh
is that really what men think!

Joel says:
do you see me ogling more at girls or cars?

♥ ling I Want To Jump And Reach The Sky, And Never Fall Back Down Again. says:
cars.
cars win without a fight.

Joel says:
haha. see.

The women don't get it. And never will.

On A Less Cryptic Note.

2007-08-05T23:10:00.000+08:00

Just had dinner with the extended family, both sides of the grandparents, uncle and little cousin. Under this huge red and white tent, with our national flag hanging from every two steel poles. 1400 people in tables of ten.

With national day songs such as 'Home' playing in the background, not-so-effectively bilingual hosts and speakers, tiny flags for every person. Three rounds of 'Yum-seng' and ten courses of chengting, sharksfin, chicken broth, deep-fried prawns, kong ba pao, and a slice of our nation's birthday cake.

My grandparents are so cute I swear. And my ah-gong is gonna give us watches.

And finally a time when my slight prowess in Hokkien comes into use. Its fun speaking Hokkien. It does sound a bit crude no doubt, but its all the more, homely.

I wonder how many more of such dinners we will have. Many more to come perhaps. Not so many maybe.

Already mummy doesn't see her parents often enough, like perhaps once a year. Or twice. She's not setting the best example for us kids, no? Daddy makes a lot more effort. We see our paternal grandparents once a week without fail. Sunday dinners usually.

Did I mention we won the lucky draw? We got a package of Shokubutsu bath foams, facial washes, Mama lemon dishwashing liquids, toothbrushes and toothpastes, all household sized. Much more useful then those big hampers with who-knows-what in them.

My Greek essay is far from finished. So is my econs essay.

WRITE WRITE WRITE CHURN CHURN CHURN.

We'll Never Be Victim Enough.

2007-08-05T16:31:00.000+08:00

Bang Bang is over, with two great runs (somewhat yes (:). As our first FULL J1 production, its something to be proud of. Beams.

Had the most existential talk with Rox, starting from the toilet to outside the Substation on two white plastic chairs against the wall. It would not have made any sense to anyone passing by, because the words we used were so vague it would fly above anyone's head. Madam was highly amused by it listening to part of our conversation.

The conversation started off with me wanting to talk about 'something'. And she immediately got it, whether or not I truly meant it. And it progressed to 'how do you know what something is it', 'is it not what you want to talk about', in knowing tones. It then went on to 'How much DO you know', and 'I know alot, much in fact'.

'I know a lot more than people think I do.'

It was about what I knew, what she knew, what she knew I knew, how I got to know it, what others thought she didn't know, what I'm glad others didn't know.

How if it were the other way round, and 'she' knew what I knew in turn, how 'she' would feel what I am feeling now.

Perhaps 'she' does know, perhaps 'sh'e does feel the same way I do, but at least 'she' doesn't know to extent I do.

It was a most unfortunate way of knowing. And neither of the people directly involved know I know. And yet, my knowing is still at its most supercial.

I know now. I still don't know.

And despite knowing, it hasn't changed anything much, as it possibly should.

What has changed however, is the intensity of how I'm affected by it.

And no one can know. It is what you can't know.

'I know. Because I can't know right? I still do care, alright?'

LET me not mar that perfect dream
By an auroral stain,
But so adjust my daily night
That it will come again.

I Know I'll Be Alive.

2007-07-31T22:10:00.000+08:00

A Freedom Fighter.
A Terrorist.

A Love Of Life.
A submission under the Fear Of Death.

A Draw Of Breath.
A desperate lack of air.

A Flutter Of Wings,
A dying moment.

Love At First Sight.
Dillusionment at second glance.

A second lost,
A moment immortalised.

And this is a mere portion of what I scribbled in GP as I was supposed to write my essay on Terrorism, trying desperately not to fall asleep.

where there is hatred, let me sow love;

where there is injury, pardon;

where there is doubt, faith;

where there is despair, hope;

where there is darkness, light;

and where there is sadness, joy.

grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;; to be understood, as to understand;; to be loved, as to love;

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

- Saint Francis Prayer of Peace, The Serenity Prayer. I may not be christian, but regardless, these prayers moved me. They were read out, first by my secondary school principal, and once more by Mrs Chan. Miss J, read out the Saint Frances Prayer of Peace during this morning's devotions. A gospel against all negative thoughts. Thoughts of Self-Consciousness, Thoughts of Insecurity, Self-Pity. As I sometimes sing.

Am I not pretty enough
Is my heart too broken
Do I cry too much
Am I too outspoken

Don't I make you laugh
Should I try it harder
Why do you see right through me

I live, I breathe, I let it rain on me
I sleep, I wake, I try hard not to break
I crave, I love, I've waited long enough
I try as hard as I can

I laugh, I feel, I make believe it's real
I fall, I freeze, I pray down on my knees
I hope, I stand, I take it like a man
I try as hard as I can

You can't know the smiles and agony you cause me inside.

Motto For The Following Week: I WILL SURVIVE.

2007-07-27T20:03:00.001+08:00

ACJC J1 DEP CLASS OF 2008 in RGS foyer.
2 loyalties combined, no? (:

I Want A Herd Of Cattle Back From India.

2007-07-23T21:50:00.000+08:00

Why can't I dance for heavens sake. Sigh.

THINK POSITIVE THOUGHTS.

Smile and move on.

I Can't Think Of A Title Cos My Brain Is Pretty Fried.

2007-07-16T23:43:00.000+08:00

There has been many points of reflection these few days. Maybe I should go through it systematically. Then again, I'm never systematic. So I shall just go where my pen takes me (well yeah, its a figure of speech alright.) As George Bernard Shaw said, 'I never invent a plot: I let the play write itself and shape itself, which it always does even when up to the last moment I don't forsee the way out.' As for now, all I forsee is possible ecstasy, depresssion, exasperation or pur dullness. It could go all ways I swear.

I would like to write something really intellectual. Perhaps something sentimental and ethereal. Perhaps something quirky. Really, it should just be as cryptic as possible so it won't be so easy for my readers (however limited) to guess my emotions so easily. But cryptic is tiring. Inneundos and allusions and metaphors are literari-ly draining.

Maybe I should start of with this small episode.

We got out from tapestry rehearsal, and helluva we ran down the bleachers onto the field in the middle of the track, screaming and prancing in darkness. My, the enveloping darkness and open sky in the cool air was so refreshing. And we just needed to let off all the pent up emotion, exasperation, happiness that has littered the past 7 months in JC. Verbalisation is always the way to go.

Pent up inside me was the happiness since coming to AC. Its the sense of fufilment, the sense of being loved, the sense of belonging to something somewhere, the feeling of self-security, the freedom to let my craziness run astray, that I have possibly experienced before, but not in such quantities and intensity.

Bottled inside was the sense of impending increasing pressure, of the impending arrival of being squeezed. The mounting amount of involvement in drama, the mounting commitment, mounting reliance, mounting expectations. The mounting amount of homework, the mounting requirements. The mounting dire need to multi-task and to over-achieve.

Somewhere deeper down inside was the sense of longing, the longing to feel as intensely as I once had before. The longing to fall so hard and so far down I couldn't possibly fathom climbing out of. The longing to hurt so bad that I would bawl my eyes out. The longing to be felt about in the same way too. The longing for someone, something. Its been too long. Perhaps the VPS (Violent Passion Surrogate) out of the World State in 'Brave New World' would do the trick. But again, I digress.

And there, I scream. Shout, in a supported manner, using my diaphram properly in a grounded position mind you. And all the way from my inch-below-navel, I scream it out.

My bottle was far from bursting, it really wasn't filled to the limit. It's a relatively happy bottle. But its good to let it out once in a while, no?

AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

And I become comfortably numb.

I Want A Coin-Operated Boy.

2007-07-15T12:52:00.000+08:00

If only a coin-operated boy were true. Yes, where all the pleasures can be derived night and day at my own convenience.

No thank you, I'm not referring to a dildo by the way. If only emotional pleasures were as easily obtained as physical ones.

If only my unexplained(well I do know what is causing it in fact, shh) periods of intense stoned-ness and sian-ness and lethargy (actually it could be partially attributed to my previous sickness and period, but still.) could be easily cured.

I get quite affected when I sense that people detest me or dislike me. As if they were repelled from me. I think I've won back certain people who for a very short period of time emitted the vibes that say 'I don't like you. Stay away.' I'm happy for that. But it has recently come to my knowledge that someone whom I have barely interacted with has declared that she doesn't like me.

Its inconsequential I suppose, it would not directly affect any of my prospects or friendships if she didn't like me. But still. Gah.

I do feel pretty damn dumb. For unmentionable reasons. I think its serious, so much so it hurts. Not good, not one bit good. And possibly not one bit worth it.

But I'm feeling lots better now. I love my friends did I mention that.

Friends who will take the effort to be concerned about my unexplained depression, friends who bother to cast their eyes heaven-bound and back to the ground again, friends who can immediately guess my worries.

Friends who are wacky, kooky, so freaking adorable it hurts. Friends who I know without a doubt I can trust with my unmentionable secrets.

Friends who I don't mind whining and appearing at my most stupid, crazy and vulnerable in front of, because I know they might stare at me throught the slit of their eyes but still love me anyhow.

Friends who are closet perverts and sex-crazed. Friends who people will pay good money for to see in a hot pink high slit cheongsam. Friends who I can speak in crazy accents with. Friends who have a BMI of 16.1 (HAHA.)

Friends I can call up and complain about being depressed and hungry 11 times each for 48 mins straight.

Yes that's you. You and you and you.

I LOVVVEEEE YOUUUUU MUAAAKK MUUUAAAKKKK MUAAAAAKKKKK.

And life is going pretty much well. If only something in particular would go a little better.

But we can't be greedy, no?

It Figures.

2007-07-07T21:48:00.000+08:00

Its been more than a week of slogging for the J2s in their A level drama exams, and another week to go. My skin's breaking out, and I still HAVE NOT WATCHED TRANSFORMERS.

After this week, it'll be back to school, or to 'Civilisation' as De Wei calls it (YES DARLING, I miss you too. (:) But it means stuff like PW EoM is due, GP stuff due, LIT HW DUE. Which I have not touched by the way. It means actually coming to school in school uniform instead of blacks, which has been our standard attire for the past month or so.

It means, GETTING BACK TERM RESULTS, and the Imminent Departure Of Mr Ibrahim off to Uni in London. His absence shall be felt and his random-ness shall be missed.

And right now I'm feeling groggy and drowsy from the meds. I slept from 10am to 1.30, and 4pm-6pm, thanks to the meds. Whee.

I apologise for my incoherence.

You're Looking At Perfection.

2007-07-04T20:32:00.000+08:00

MY BRACES HAVE COME OFF. And their surfaces feel real smooth now. Whee.

Its been days in the theatre again. Feeling like a rabbit because of the rabbit-tish food I've been consuming. i.e. yogurt, raisin bread, watermelon, slivers of chicken. Had RICE and SOUP for lunch today though so very happy.

And it feels really nice to sit next to someone, and feeling the heaving of the other person's breathing. Feeling your own breath go in sync or alternate to his breathing.

It'll probably never amount to anything. Not because, but becuse. But for now.

And no, you shan't find out who it is. Because.

Ooooohhh Yeah Baby.

2007-06-29T11:44:00.000+08:00

TERMS ARE OVER.

Whee. And in celebration, this is what went down.

I can't stand it, WHY IS MARK AND ALL OF THEM SO PHOTOGENIC.

The Bubble Tea Escapade @ Dover Market

oh brooding dheraj.

How absolutely adorableee.

And this was how it ended up. Casualties: 2
This is what happens when boys try to prove their manliness by downing 5 cups of bubble tea each.

After this episode, went home slept, got up, went back to school, and *censored* in front of the principals, some random teachers, and DEP seniors.

WAIT WHATTT?!

Yeah. MY LIFE IS RUINED.

What Mrs Chan (Principal Of ACJC) attempted to say to me as I tried to hide my face against the wall:

"It was very good, all very good. Just don't do it as a profession. "

SCREAMS.

I Need To Stop Depressing.

2007-06-26T22:47:00.001+08:00

As my title suggests. I need to stop depressing.

I'm never this way, I'm a happy kid. Only for things I instinctively deem as important, consequential... meaningful.

Really, the only reason im fretting, is that my comm position is in dire jeopardy. And I do want this. And to think I'm going to be thwarted by failing H1 math. Or the very real possibility of doing so.

'Joleen, joleen, joleen, joleeennnnnnnn' The song is stuck in my head. Its at the side if you would like to listen to it.

It'll be over in the morning

The World's About To Destroyed, There's No Point Getting All Annoyed, So Long And Thanks For All The Fish.

2007-06-24T20:11:00.000+08:00

Ok, haven't been blogging, so the day BEFORE EXAMS, I shall spill my thoughts here. Whee.

Its been days of stuffing myself with buffets with Alvin, which I sorely attribute the self-perceived gain in weight or flab to. Photoshoot for Arabian Nights was interesting, and from that day I have come to the sad conclusion that my hair is my only asset. But perhaps it isn't a bad thing. *SOBS* Hee. Hmm, perhaps its the same way with nick and his abs. I'm babbling here.

There has been progress in my academic pursuits with a whole day of mugging math with H1 math buddy PJ, and my Econs notes are mainly done. Lit has been quite thoroughly went through with. So I hope my scholarly and dramatic pursuits won't be thwarted with utter failure for terms.

ALVIN HAS FLOWN OFF. Here's the photo log of the last few days. (OMG how long haven't I posted pics. pics stolen from fang's blog. (:)

me and fang at the new fountain at suntec after KUSHIN BO.

Dim Sum buffet: BEFORE

AFTER

as fang wrote as her caption: pick one. (:
(eh wait, the middle 2 are taken)
Isn't this photo cute? I TOOK IT I TOOK IT. Great World City is such an ulu-ated place now.

I TOOK THIS AGAIN.
Sianying, Yao Xian, Lester, Tsung Siang, Fang, Alvin, Eddie. The whole gang.

Plus ME. See, its shaky WHEN I DONT HOLD THE CAM. (:

Wonder when we will next have such an outing.

--

It was like a parellel episode out of Great Expectations. Such a random thought, but that's really what it reminded me of, after that moment swept past.

I remember that feeling, that sensation of the breath being sucked out of you, and you're heart pounding uncharacteristically loud. Its not really the speed at which it beats, although it does speed up, but how hard each beat is. As if with every beat, the breath is pounded out of my chest.

I remember that surreal sensation, which only one person has made me felt. I remember the moment when I first experienced it, and the moments which made my body react involuntarily and uncontrollably that way.

Its odd that a similar sensation is felt despite the different emotions attached to the seperate moments. Moments of elation and floating on air, moments of intense heart ache, moments of I-have-no-idea-what-just-happened-and-am-not-quite-sure-how-to-feel.

It is uncanny the way this expected yet unexpected encounter played out. The said encounter must have played out in mind many numerous times in an array of situations and outcomes, with a spectrum of emotions, scenarios, locations. It was eventually inevitable, judging from the size of our tiny island, but well I far from expected it to happen on such a day at such a place, in such a casual yet ironic uncanny way.

I remember clearly the last encounter played out almost a year ago. I even remember the exact date, however insignificant and pointless it is to do so. Again it was an uncanny encounter. Out of 50, 000 people, out of all the times to leave.

With the exact same group of people, with the same crucial person the very last point of direct contact and connection was passed on. With the same group of people who I barely congregate with, with the same person who was only in town for 2 weeks. In the most random of locations, which I haven't laid foot in for years.

Once again, the moment was fleeting, uber-casual, and no one could tell what it meant to me, perhaps except for the same person who stood beside me during the last encounter. The same person who stood beside me this time, in the oddest of circumstances.

As ironic as it was, there was a added layer of satire. The new player amongst the same formation of the past. Oh, it did not shock or hurt me. All it did was within this parellel, emphasise all that has changed, all that has been and will no longer be.

I guess this would be the last time you will have that effect on me. And I wish you all the very very best, whether you hear me or not.

And I say this not in bitterness, perhaps a little in melancholy. But more so in remembrance, like a bitter-sweet closing chapter. So that ever so often I am reminded of you, or rather the memory of you, a chapter is written in closing.

And all I am waiting for now, is for a new chapter to unfold.

I Will Follow You Into The Dark.

2007-06-18T21:06:00.000+08:00

No study done at all today. Grahh.

Lunch with Alvin and Fang at expensive (well at least to me) Jap buffet. Mmmmm, excellent SALMON SASHIMIIII that melts in your mouth ahh. Stuffed ourselves for a full 3 hours, with breaks in between of course.

Alvin is one rubbishy old man ( Why, Fang whyyyy. :P), and this rubbishy old man is flying freeze-dried and sealed airtight back to the US of A to be stored in Harvard frolicking with said diplomats not to be viewed by Singaporean eyes for 2 years. We had a 'tearful' parting at the MRT station, with me offering to hug him and him 'sobbing' and throwing his arms over me. I won't see him for the next 2 years, so jolly well take care of yourself old man and make lots of connections, try to pass Harvard, make yourself profitable, and benefit me in some way monetarily, financially or otherwise besides benefitting your darling.

Then went to meet Mommy and sisters for shopping extravaganza which ended up in mostly buying my stuff, which I didn't really ask for but didn't exactly refuse. Make-up and skin care products from Bodyshop galore. Foundation, loose powder, mascara, eye-liner, eye shadow, the whole deal. It'll be useful for many coming productions. And the Tea Tree range of facial stuff. I'm not complaining (: But we did get lots of underwear for my sisters, which amounted to $150. Underwear is expensive.

I hope I bring myself to find time to study enough, judging by the coming commitments of the week, I had better use all the remaining time I have got.

And I realised what I find super duper attractive in a guy. If a guy likes kids, and plays with them, pats their tiny heads, with those tender eyes, its soooo hot. Sorry, but a guy with a soft side is so sexy. Its so 'Awwwww'.

Oh I realised I haven't announced this here yet. MY BRACES ARE COMING OFF. On the 3rd of July! How excitingggg.

Quiz of the Day:

What famous song is this:
'Tweeler! Tweeleerrrrrr!'

Micheal Jackson's 'Thriller'. Well that's the way my sister is singing it. WHEE.

P.S. Right now I miss Yelyn and Josh. I demand you guys COME BACKKK.

Blatant Hard-Selling

2007-06-14T10:44:00.000+08:00

ACSian Theatre Proudly Presents

BANG BANG YOU'RE DEAD

by William Mastrosimone

03 Aug 2007

04 Aug 2007

7.30pm

$15

The Substation

Guinness Theatre

This play was made to show and end violence and teasing between teenagers in schools. When the play was performed for the first time, more than 100,000 downloads from internet occurred of the video play and many other schools around the world began to perform the play. The play centers on the lead character Josh, a teenage boy who shoots his parents and five schoolmates, and is then haunted by physical manifestations of his memories of them.

Bang Bang You're Dead is a thoughtful and provocative examination of the inner world of a young killer in the wake of a horrific school shooting. The motivations are twisted and obfuscated and the intent behind the deed remains shrouded by ego as well as despair. ACSian theatre invites the audience to unravel the mystery of teenage angst and malcontent and why it erupts into murderous rampage and soul destroying alienation.

Bang Bang You’re Dead was written in 1999 in memorial to the various teenage dead of school killings in the United States. It remains a painfully relevant piece of work in the light of the death at Virginia Tech, USA, in 2007.

ACSian Theatre is the repertory arm of the Anglo–Chinese Junior College Drama Elective Programme and a proud member of the performance arts culture of the college. “Bang Bang You’re Dead” showcases the talents of current students of the college, particularly the year one students.

Yayness, PUBLICITY.

Crazy Drama Kids.

2007-06-11T20:19:00.000+08:00

one. I just have to say this. I have 35 chain emails in my inbox from a massive influx of random rubbish from drama comm '08, a.k.a. M-13.

two. Jasmin is so freaking efficent, our first no-agenda comm meeting is in place somewhat.

three. Edlyn, Bang Bang rehearsals on 22nd are at 1pm not 2pm.

four. Bang Bang posters are up and shirts are coming in TMR(WTH)

five. We all need to study instead of sending chain mails.

six. I don't want to sing and strip again tmr. Well, somewhat.

seven. NEED TO STUDYYYY.

eight. I miss Yeeelyn. And Mark to some extent.

nine. I'm super full. Dewei is a rich home-less kid.

ten. signing off and love always, ling.

Had I Known How To Save A Life.

2007-06-11T11:37:00.000+08:00

Tralala. My throat infection of last week has re-occured, and I'm having the same symptoms all over again. Shall take old meds and hope all is well and all is fine. Maybe its because I forgot to finish the course of anti-biotics. I'm forgetful that way.

Probational Drama Comm '08 is in place, with 13 lovely memebers. Edlyn, Yelyn, Mark, Lesley, Jen Jen, Schwa, June, Jasmin, Nick, Dheraj, Su Yee, Roxanne and moi. BEAMS, i love all the lovely people. (: And the odd meeting wasn't some form of secret torture (HENG) but was purely a meeting and a whole day of crew work, but we survived and had fun, listening to Nick screaming his head off, Dheraj and Jen on their racist joke spree, and Jasmin trying to get us back to work. Heard the seniors had to clean the cage and workshop and paint the studio last year, so we are a lucky batch. whee.

Had my first ever photoshoot on Sat, somewhere right at the end of Linden Drive, baking in the sun and being fed to suspiscious Aedes mosquitos (well they were black and white striped). I flicked one on Vicki's forehead and it splattered and died, though I conveniently did not tell her. It was really fat. Shudders. I have a tan the shape of my dress on my back now. Yay, can't wait for the photos to come out.

Met up with Inventio group yesterday to look for scripts, found a few. Our group would be the last group anyone would expect to do a Chinese piece, but we are considering it. Heh. Imagine Schwa in a tight red cheong sam as a bitchy wife. LOL. Trust Dewei to make sure this vision materialises. WHEE.

I'm finally starting my study plans, starting off with the most comfortable Lit. Great Expectations almost done, tralaala. Next on the list Econs, then Math (I need help from the H2 peopleeeee), then DEP, then GP. PW is somewhere looming.

Gonna collect Bang Bang shirts (WHEE) and put up the posters later in the afternoon.

I want to eat ice cream. ICE CREAAAMMMM.

I need to put up photos. Hmm.

And Maybe.

2007-06-07T16:20:00.001+08:00

Its at times like when I start to feel a little lonely.

Days which are not filled by friends and school and shopping. Days you just sit at home, and stone.

Even when the whole of the last week you've had a million and one things to do. And you've got more to do the next day. Even though you have spent more than enough quality time with the people you love and who love you, my lovely friends. Even when things are going well, and there are no troubles.

Its just that little emptiness, that was never quite filled up since that day.

--
Moving along,

Its been days of shopping:
. Beach road and Bugis with schwa and johanna
. Orchard with jess and mich lai lovely pri school mates

Days of Rehearsals:
. BANG BANG
. Ebel's IS

Days of watching performances:
. Evening with friends AC Choir
. Dreams in flight at the Padang
. Romeo and Juliet with the senior DEP class

Days of dinner:
. Watching Alvin and Lester stuff themselves with steamboat.

Yes, Alvin is looking more and more like an uncle. YOU ARE OLD. :D

Next Up...

. Some odd meeting for the people running for drama comm tmr. *shudders*
. More Bang Bang
. More Ebel's IS
. Probably more shopping. (Must bring Mummy who has the Money)

... MUG MUG MUG.

Darn I'm hungry again.

Someone Stop Me. Someone Stop Me Now.

2007-06-03T20:52:00.001+08:00

Yelyn sucks. She can't type chinese. Period. HAHAA. It's okay darling, we all still love you, HOT STUFF :P Having fun Down Under while we suffer here eh. FINE. FINNEEE.

And once again I have to marvel at the amazing speed at which drama people migrate. When you're let off from rehearsal before one and finish lunch at somewhere 5 minutes away from school at 4, you know we're having way too much fun together.

Me and schwa make the oddest pair to shop together. But what the hell, we have fun at it. And yes darling we all understand why you wonder how on earth you have friends like us, when you are not particularly friendly or amicable or personable. But well yeah, too bad. WE LUBBB YOU. SCH-WAAAA. Too bad you have the two people who say you're lovely nickname in the most extra-cutesy way imaginable in your group. GRINS. WE ROCK JEN JEN.

My plan to start mugging hasn't had lift-off at yet. But I'll get there, I swear.

And today was one boring boring day indeed. WHERE IS MICH LAI. I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU, IN LIKE, ER, WEEKS.

Here's some emo stuff to keep us all going.

So you make your face a mask.
A mask that hides your face.
A face that hides the pain.
A pain that eats your heart.
A heart nobody knows. --> EH THIS IS MY LINE. I CLAIM OWNERSHIP OF THIS LINE.

I'm running on some sort of sugar-high now. Someone Stop Me. Someone Stop Me Now.

And till now I still feel a little skewered.
A little drizzled in vinegar.
I suppose I do still miss you.

Rrrrrrrr.

2007-05-31T13:37:00.000+08:00

'Blasphemy Raspberry.'

My sis keeps repeating it for no reason whatsoever. Just being random here.

Today is my first day out of the company of drama people since my hols started, i.e. no need to go to school, whee. And finally, Inventio group settled, after a small episode fuelled by, certain... well let's not say. Me is considerably happy with me group, Dewei, Lesley, Schwaaa, Jen Jen and new addition Zhi Peng, whom we are having faith in to step up. (: Now to started ploughing through book shelves to find scripts, or start conceptualising one for ourselves. Hmmmms.

Need to catch up on reading my Great Expectations, (I am erm 14 chpts behind? When i finished all of Brave New World, how smart.) But well I've always savoured a perverse dystopia more than a buildungsroman(Is that how you spell it? Rrrrr, my spelling sucks.)

Certain thoughts after drama comm interview. I sounded real good, sure of myself and ready to take on whatever hits me. Perhaps I sounded better than what I really could achieve. At the back of mind I know that if I do get this, its gonna be one hell of a time, in both senses of its connotations. As madam put it, am I willing to face the pressure that comes with my heightened visibility not only as a leader, but also as a scholar (however over-rated it may be), and a person. But as I said so myself, its partly the reason I stepped out of my comfort-zone to traverse into a new environment, to not settle just for mediocrity, but for excellence. (Haha, funny the way it sounds.) The support of my friends to just go for it, the encouragement and affirmation, I thank you guys for it.

But well taking the analogy that Johanna used, I have already put my name into the Goblet of Fire, no turning back now. Whether my name its spat back out, that's up to fate that lies in the hands of certain people. Whatever the result, I know now that I had better jolly well live up to my words. And I think I can do it. There isn't a reason why I should not.

Rrrrrr.

Oh, Lonely Nights.

2007-05-29T23:21:00.000+08:00

Tonight was an pseudo-emo one, started off by nick. Singing emo songs on the way home, have expressions of emo-ness at the dinner table. It was a sweet emo at the hospital where mark just finished his tyhroid(i can't spell it) operation, and we all love mark. A huge bunch of people surounding his bed, he must feel much loved. (:

A busy busy day once more, starting off with econs class, drama comm interview (!!!), followed by bang bang rehearsals, and at the amazing speed at which drama people move and how long the shuttle bus to NUH takes and how we are inherently apt at killing time, I got home at 10. 45, late as I have been the last few days of dinners and choir concert etc.

And something that happened 2 nights ago still perplexes me. Who on earth was it that called me and woke me from my slumber at 2 plus in the night, that impersonated mark by virtue of me guessing that it was him, said i love you, and freaked me out. I only realised it was not mark that called when I asked him about it the next day. And that gave me the chills. Odd feeling of vague familiarity with that voice.

Perhaps I'm thinking too much. Perhaps its just some prank call.

But why does it nag me so.

Perhaps it was the way the numerous 'hmms.' where delivered.

Perhaps it was the way those three words were said.

Perhaps.

Perhaps, Perhaps.

And I don't my query will ever be answered.

像我們從未邂逅過，就忘記我曾經這麽為你不理智不清醒過.

2007-05-26T20:02:00.000+08:00

时间的流逝
从不停息
源源不断
它滔滔不绝。

i haven't got much to say.
well, if you're bored, go look in yesterday's life section in straits times. HAHA. hint: look out for a wash of blue.

oh yes, and i didn't do too bad for Theasthai! wheeee.

still a little bit of your song in my ear.

你也从没回头。
那么，就这样吧。

像我們從未邂逅過，就忘記我曾經這麽為你不理智不清醒過.

The Whale Swims Home.

2007-05-25T22:06:00.000+08:00

A half day at school today! Island cremery and macs after that (omg, i'm gonna bloat like a balloon), home to sleep (eat, sleep, ah, the pleasures of life)

Then the secretive meeting organised by our darling sianying, since 2 weeks ago, insisting that WE ALL MUST BE FREE THIS FRIDAY, for something very important it seemed. I never suspected much, till chu suggested, "Hasn't it occured to you that he could just be back?"

Hmm. Made sense, but didn't want to get hopes up.

And indeed, a utter failure in the element of surprise, Alvin appeared in front of our very eyes.

Dinner at cafe cartel, went home as usual playing gooseberry, well too bad fangfang lives near to me ok, and we caught the fireworks for arts fest on the way out. whee. prettyyyy fireworks.

DEP Theasthai results tmr, tralala. Early in the morning.

Glad you're back Alvin. I'm sure someone else is even happier. (:

OMG A TAGBOARD.

2007-05-23T19:37:00.000+08:00

Due to the constant nagging from josh and joel, I have finally succumbed to the pressure, to do something I have not done here before. A break-through, a step forward, a... er, surprise?

Ah, whatever. NAH, HERE YOU GO.

YOU BETTER BLOODY WELL TAG.

Or i'm gonna die of depression and inferiority and lament my lack of friends and readership night and day.

My Butt Hurts.

2007-05-23T17:36:00.001+08:00

As the title suggests, yes my butt hurts. From the sliding down in nlb dance, and contrary to what I would like to think, I doubt its because I'm too skinny.

Its the last week of school, and I can't wait for it to end. Need some recharge time, and June hols are just timely. Not as if we'll be very free, everyone has all sorts of things to do, and terms to mug for. But still, a holiday counts for something.

I miss the dancers missing in action from school, all the best for Restless guys!

Now thinking about it, I should have signed up for CAP. Darn. It would be fun spending a week with chu, schwa, szus and getting to know new people, increase my prospects at a non-existant love-life (ha.) and I've always liked camps, esp with creative writing workshops and theatre workshops. How fun. Too late. Whee.

Yes, please remind chu to help me bring stockings tmr, and hopefully I can fit into the white boy shorts yelyn is helping us get. Lovely. Looking forward to prancing around in front of ministers tmr. (:

AH IM HUNGRY.

In The Depths, I Desire.

2007-05-21T23:01:00.000+08:00

But why,
Under the facade of words that allude,
Refer to a subject that once was and now is not,
To break the theatrical illusion,
The fourth wall of memory,
The chastity of yonder,
The purity of what has to fade.

To reopen an unsealed wound,
To shuffle the allusion of your words so loosely,
To let that budding flower of a new-born Spring,
Which has lay dormant in the darkest winters,
To be exposed,
And prematurely forced petal by wrinkled petal,
Apart.

A love that once was,
An illusion that once was lost,
A shattered mess of dis-repair.
The pieces flushed upon the shores,
Brought back, rushed again,
Lacerating surface of the sand.

And this bitterness,
Arrives not in unforgiveness,
Not in tarry and stagnation,
But in a disappointment.
A desecration of an illusion,
Of what was true and pure.

And perhaps,
In the depths, I Desire.
That all is not what I make out to be,
That all be what I know could never be.

Tye-melane.

WOOHOO.

2007-05-20T18:06:00.000+08:00

Huzzah! Theasthai is done! And we all enjoyed ourselves, and my sisters and long lost act 3 friend kim came to watch me. People seemed to enjoy our piece, so hurray! Everyone said they really liked mao mao's Kuo Pao Kun's commiting suicide piece. I WANT TO WATCHHH. bleh. Got lots of chocs, a cookie, flowers and a, well, yes, banana. Trust nick and dheraj to come up with such ideas.

Went out after that with bunch of cj kids who were with kim, with dewei, chu, nat, rachel and chu's weird friend ben, as well as markie darling and yelyn. I was running about between Starbucks and BK to talk to bunches of different people, kop-ping people's food for me is broke from all the paying for tickets, taxi fares blah blah.

On another note, I got the humanities scholarship! How cool is that.

Ebel came over this morning, made my hair one frizzy mess with tons of hairspray and rollers, took loads of photos, and I had to wash it all off again.
NLB dance rehearsal again tmr, my dancing debut (AHAHAA) on thurs, josh and joel coming back to ac tmr, and I didn't go for the outing today to watch spidey 3, too tired and lazy. hee.

Its odd how we are so excited after just a 3-5 min performance, but well, we survived our first practical exam for DEP intact, so I suppose its a cause for celebration. Now to brace ourselves for the last week of school and our academic pursuits towards terms after June hols. Must begin living up to myself as a humanities scholar (HA).

Nobody Loves Me, Everybody Hates Me, I'm Gonna Eat Some Worms.

2007-05-18T10:15:00.001+08:00

Just finished the arduous process of printing my GP opposing viewpoints articles in the library. Me no like the intranet, and neither does it like me.

Thesthai is TOMMOROW (OMG). Me and Dewei have been over-intellectualising the whole process, causing us to over-do things and destroy the comedy as well as what we started off with. We recognised it and decided we're just gonna have fun and do what we always do, and what we do best. (:

NLB dance isn't that bad anymore, again over-intellectualising, so decided should just have fun! Just hope I don't trip and fall with that dress and don't kill dheraj who has to lift me.

Bang Bang rehearsals have been refreshing, its been a while since I've done a proper production, and the actress in me is itching, same for Dewei, haha. Hella glad I'm in Bang Bang.

Going for some SYF emcee thingy later, SO I CAN'T GO FOR THE HWA CHONG DRAMA THINGY WITH FANG AND SIAN AND SHAN. And they can't come for Theasthai. Ah, like everyone can't make it. Actually I MIGHT be able to make it tonight, but I didn't want to take that risk and had to let the ticket go. boo hooooo.

Nobody Loves Me, Everybody Hates Me, I'm Gonna Eat Some Wormsssss.

Actually its, Yay, I Think 2 People Love Me, for 2 peple have declared 'I Love You' online yesterday night, in response to my pseudo-emoness. Yay. (: I love you too ning and josh! hearts.

In a more reflective mood, really enjoying my life now, despite all the work and staying back late. I absolutely love the people around me, I've never felt better about myself (its been a long way in progress), and I love doing what I love.

Only glitch is that no one can come for Theasthai, sobs. But its ok~!(:

And for the first time in my whole entire pathetic existence in the Singapore education system,

I HAVE GOT A SILVER FOR NAPFA WITHOUT A HITCH.

When I have been barely passing allll these years.

The amazing effects of drama.

In Dreams.

2007-05-10T00:11:00.000+08:00

A dream is a wish your heart makes
When you're fast asleep
In dreams you lose your heartaches
Whatever you wish for, you keep
Have faith in your dreams and someday
Your rainbow will come smiling thru
No matter how your heart is grieving
If you keep on believing
the dream that you wish will come true

In dulcet tones I hear one speak,
'Leave me alone, wretched day.'
And I cry, 'Oh Lord, help me so!'
I was flung,
Flung from the depths,
I engorge all existence.

"There's A Little Bird Sitting In The Tree, In The Tree, All Alone..."

2007-05-06T17:05:00.000+08:00

Blogger format is looking really weird today.

Been in the theatre the past few days again. Yesterday night I broke a personal record for the lastest time yet to leaves school, breaking our backs to move all the struts and boards back into school. 12.20, i think we left school.

The world does look different from the back of a truck, and I'm sure we looked like illegal immigrants all in black, sitting looking very forlorn (well ok not exactly). But as madam tells us, smile, so that the police don't mistake us for child labour.

Been up in the light box again for the J2 DEP exams, (note: we'll be doing this too in a year). It didn't all go too bad, except for my MAJOR screw-up with Rashomon *IM SO SORRYYYYYYYY* during Culminatio. I hope my seniors don't hate me now. Nah, my seniors are very nice people. (is wary that Chin the blog-stalker may likely read this (:)

It was fun despite all that manual labour and stress over my hand determining the imminent fate of my seniors pieces. (Well, if i didn't turn on no lights, there would be no show. We can all happily watch darkness.) And I'll be culled and hung, burnt and pressed.

GREAT JOB LOVELY SENIORS, LOVES YOU CREW (ESP ROX a.k.a. SLAVE DRIVER).

We had lots of fun doing wacky improvisation on stage, 'The tale of 2 intestines', making SCHWAAA act like a girl and Mark roll all over the floor. And practising announcements following the tone of the music, (tried to do it over 'sexy back', didn't work.)

On another note, we've had our first consultation. Didn't go too bad, and really happy to be working with Dewei. We can do this, we had better, our combined experience should call for no less.

Went for SRT Midsummer's with complimentary tickets! It is real fun sitting on grass and watching the action go on all around, and my god was Micheal hilarious or what. HAHAHAHAAA. And by some kind of divine coincidence, many of the RJ kids went on friday as well! Met shannnn and jooo and liju, val, kexin for the first time in quite a while! And I didn't know that joo is RJ's new council president! HOW COOL IS THAT.

Econs essay test tmr!! Which leads me to proudly say that I topped my class for our first practice essay! *BEAMS*

I went back to school to see my handwriting photocopied for everyone, quite freaky.

Just hope I do as well in ther test honestly.

NEEDS TO STUDY. I HAVEN'T TOUCHED ANYTHING.

Aspirations and Direction.

2007-04-30T15:16:00.000+08:00

woo, home to nap, NLB dance auditions after this at 4.45. wahaha, imagine me, dancing. lets just try, try very very hard.

im going to nap.

Ola!

2007-04-26T20:18:00.000+08:00

Just had a usual school day, realising how absolutely absent minded I am, placing my worksheets all over the place, losing my $48 Econs textbook which i realise is with Dewei, having to source through the stacks of wkshts in my bag for all my lessons. Its quite a miracle I have been handing in my work on time. I'm quite proud of myself. But well no choice, that's the way it is in AH. Man it's more motivation anyone can get even in RJ i bet. I truely mean it.

Interclass Taboo against AD4, with 3 drama kids in their team, was a blast. Absolutely entertaining. Hurray Taboo! And I so wanna join Arts Council! Had PW meeting on GPP over Jap food at the cafe, which was very productive (really, I do love my classmates and groupmates). And a stark delayed realisation that Jia Jun MAY VERY WELL leave on UWC scholarship devastated me.

I DON'T WANT JIAJUN TO LEAVEEEE NOOOOOOOO. (Heh.)
WHAT WILL I DO WITHOUT JIAJUNNNNNNN.

Hahaaaaa.

On another more sane note, AC DANCE GOT GOLD WITH HONOURS. Excellent, congrats all the dancers, esp drama-dancers, which are aplenty. (:

Lots of projects coming up for drama as usual, AM GONNA AUDITION FOR DANCE for NLB proj. I need to overcome my fear of dancing and establish if I can actually dance at all. *CROSSES FINGERS*

Being able to dance will prove very advantageous and even crucial for future 'career' in Drama.
Right now, I think I have 2 left feet. And all the pro dancers scare me.

INFERIORITY STRIKES.

But we must all TRYYY. Dewei and Yelyn are going too so hurray.

ANNNDDDDDD. Me and Dewei had better start concretising our Duo. I'm a little worried though there is not yet warrant for worry.

And the fried pork is screwing up my throat. WATER WATER.

Talking To God On The Phone.

2007-04-20T12:49:00.001+08:00

Here's what I did for DEP prep work for THEASTHAI. I decided to put it up for fun since I used blogger to save it from the school comp to print at home, and its in my drafts anyhow. Email isn't working quite well.

--

I woke up and it was a BEEAAUUUTTIIFFOOOLLLL morning. The birds is singing and the sun shining. I thank God for the very lovely day. I begin packing my bed and brushing my teeth at the same time, totally not noticing the incessent ringing of the phone. I pick up.

"Bonjour."
"Si"
"Si"
"Ciao."

That was God. He is commending my devout behaviour.

I put on my favorite-test multi-coloured flowy skirt, the only one I ever wear. I knitted it myself. I love knitting. My white blouse goes above my head.

I head down the stairs, 2 floors down and greet the people of my neighbourhood. Pablo, the old rickety senile man who is always swearing at nothing, or perhaps at the neighbourhood cat. I pat the cat and greet it, "Bonjour". Pedro the cook, not Pedro the doorman or Pedro the barber, but Pedro the Cook, grinned a toothless smile at me and winked. He is so nice. All the girls thinks he fancies me. Ton Ton looked at my fortune through the revered crystal ball at says that he fancies me. And what Ton Ton says, is never wrong.

I hum, "Corazona, corazon.." And walk down 2 blocks to the manicure parlour. Past the display with a singular mannequin, with its spiky neon hair and peeling paint, sat my best friend, Rosalina, buffing the nails of Consuela, the barber's wife, chattering away. I push open the flimsy door, past the sign "Sexy Nails HERE.", and the mechanical parrot greets me with a sharp 'Ola!'

The girls grin at my entrance and greetings ensue.

"Morning, senoritas! Comari ta?"

"Ay ay Maria, the same each day", remarks Estela good-naturedly, while keeping her eyes on her customers bright purple nails. Her make-up is a little too much as usual, with her favourite bright pink lipstick, and the chewing of that gum as usual.

Rosalina pulls me by my skirt and sits me down at her 'booth' and gigglingly asks,
"So, has Pedro made his move?"
"Pedro the barber, the doorman or the cook?"
"The cook!"

And then I start ranting on, on how he grinned at me, and what Ton Ton said, and how Pedro the barber is really nice too, and how at the door yesterday I bought 2 apples and a few peppers from Pedro's wife, Pedro the doorman, not Pedro the cook or Pedro the barber, and how I heard the Pedro was having a affair with Esmerelda, the daughter of the neighburhood's crazy old man.

Roosalina just shrieks in excitement and nods excitedly. That’s why I love her.

After all my topics are exhausted by a third, I decide that I have to go earn my living.

"Remember to help me ask Dr Fritz about the wart removal!" screams Rosalina as I walk past the mechanical parrot. "Only when you get an appointment!" I reply.

I remember how Ton Ton foretold that a fly will irritate my day at Maria's souvenir shop and offices of Dr Fritz, in my father's old butcher shop front. How true indeed. Well, it wasn't exactly a fly, but my souvenir cloth doll kept irritating me the whole time at the shop.

"I swear it keeps staring at me. Stop staring at me you doll!"

The phone rings. I pick up.

"Mushi mushi."
"Si."
"Si."

That was God. He tells me to stop scolding the doll and find solace in Him.

I was getting bored as no one walked into my souvenir shop, the souvenir shop of Maria, and the offices of Dr Fritz. I began knitting. I love knitting. Its no matter I haven't been able to buy any wool.

I go sharpen the huge butcher knives. Stroke by stoke I sharpen the knives.

I realised I haven't eaten all day and decide to leave the shop. I put down my knitting needles and walk out.

I go to Kun Pao Chinese Restaurant, down the street, for my favourite-test chinese dumpling soup. I see photos on the yellow walls of Ah Kun, as everyone calls the boss, with many celebrities, and I stare at the one with Enrique Iglesias, and I stare and I smile.

Its 8 o' clock, and I was getting a little sleepy, so before I feel myself going lococo, I head up the stairs to my home, "Buenos noches." I said to the neighbourhood cat. I open the wooden door, and in my one room flat I immediately plonk myself on the bed, and fall into deep deep sleep.

--

Its purposely ungrammatical okay.

Booo, I really want to go get ice cream but its starting to RAAIIINNN. bleh.

Bloody Pains. (no pun intended)

2007-04-19T16:32:00.000+08:00

Me took a pink slip home this morning.

Horrible first-day cramps and diahorreaaaaaaaa, has rendered me moaning on the bed, curled up in a featal position, in honest discomfort for the past few hours, trying without much success to read Oscar Wilde's A Picture of Dorian Grey (hey i have read about half!), and ended up falling asleep with 2 bottles of Bao Zai Yun, 2 charcoal pills and Panadol menstrual in my system.

And now I'm feeling a whole lot better and still have Econs essay and DEP homework to do. Gah.

Here are overdue pics which technology which abhors me haven't permitted to upload all these days. Alas, technology still abhors me.

'Muse' AC Band Concert

West Side!

The SRT Light Box

And Still It is Etched Into My Memory, There To Stay For Good.

2007-04-18T20:31:00.000+08:00

Been a long while since I last sat on a old open-air bus.

With that rickety bumpy-ness of the bus moving on its seemingly not perfectly circular wheels, feeling that rhythmic whirring under your feet, the bustle of its movement causing a surrounding whir, loud yet soothing, enough to mask some random humming. The hot yet oddly cooling blow of the constant wind created by the forward motion of this contraption, not doubt bringing along some dust and grime.

A great time to think, for its useless to listen to the mp3 player,the loud whir totally masks any music trying to squirm itself into one's ear drums. And then one realises, how certain images, actions, places, emotions of a certain time, perhaps quite a while a ago, seem so perfectly vivid and clear, so pristine to the point where you can recall the intricate moment of emotion associated.

And I wonder, what does this tell me. Perhaps its the same for everyone, these certain memories never seem to wash away. Perhaps I'm just overly romanticising everything. And yet, I made absolutely no conscious effort to commit these moments to memory. Maybe, its purely because its that significant to me. Even now. Perhaps I don't want to ever forget. Perhaps I don't want to ever let go.

And I wonder, what will happen, when even the notion, the escapist thoughts, the wishful figments of my imagination, this romanticising, are all dashed, and smashed. That even this un-real source of comfort, of hope, of emotion, is deemed untrue and not longer valid. What else shall be emptied of me. What else shall cause that uncontrollable spasm of loss and sadness at times when I am reminded. What else shall cause my heart to sink to the depths, which it has reached before.

I dare not phantom.

But it will be an inevitable passing, for these comforts will never come into existence. And the only way it will go, is into oblivion.

These threads that I am entwined in, have never been torn apart thoroughly, ever since I first unwittingly stepped upon them. They have only since amassed growth, and remained stagnant.

I bear not to see them ripped from me.

I need help, I need to acquire some good sense.

I need you.

But you are never coming back.

I need you.

Find me soon.

Let me find you soon.

I love you.

I hate you.

I love, the notion of your existence.

I hate, the mere suggestion of your existence.

I love myself.

I hate myself for loving and hating you.

I love myself.

I ache. And I am thoroughly useless with utterly nothing I can do about it.

And beneath the loud whir of the moving contraption, I hum an emo tune.

Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better.

2007-04-17T22:36:00.000+08:00

sleep beckons,
and i shall answer.

soon.(:

Tralala.

2007-04-13T13:08:00.000+08:00

Wow. This is my 200th post. A hallmark, a milestone. haha.

I'm on Jia Jun's laptop in the midle of the canteen next to the Cremo machine, no i'm not on duty but its apparent many are crazing for that cold delectable treat in a cone.

It's raining really heavilｙ now, pouring. And perｈaps I should stop listening to emo songs, which are beautiful, but depressing.

I'm naturally cheery i school for some reason, perpetual natural high despite piling homework and numerous chunks of script to memorise. Jia Jun sees me as a source of spilling happiness that seemingly affects the people around me. And I am glad that it is so. (:

Szus just passed the cremo machne and found his rainbow pencilbox which he has been mournin the loss of. He's happy. Drama people all around, DEP in a while AND　ＷＨＡＴ　ＴＨＥ　ＨＥＬＬ　ＨＡＰＰＥＮＥＤ　ＴＯ　ＴＨＥ　ＦＯＮＴ．ａｈｈ，　ｍｙ　ｓｃｒｉｐｔ　ｉｓ　ｓｔｉｌｌ　ｒｅａｌｌｙ　ｒｕｓｔｙ　ａｎｄ　ｉｍ　ｇｏｎｎａ　ｄｉｉｉｅｅｅ　ａ　ｈｏｒｒｉｂｌｅ　ｄｅａｔｈ．　ｗｈｅｅ．

ｏｏｏｈ　ｐｅｏｐｌｅ　ａｒｅ　ｓｔａｒｔｉｎｇ　ｃｒｅｍｏ．　ｄｈｅｒａｊ＇ｓｆｉｒｓｔ　ａｔｔｅｍｐｔ　ａｔ　ｃｒｅｍｏ　ｈｏｗ　ｅｘｃｉｔｉｎｇ．

ｄｒａｍａ　ｓｎｒｓ　ｓｔａｒｉｎｇ　ａｔ　ｍｅ　ｃｏｓ　ｉ　ｈａｖｅ　ａ　ｃｏｎｅ　ｉｎ　ｍｙ　ｍｏｕｔｈ　ａｎｄ　ｔｙｐｉｎｇ　ａｗａｙ．　ｉｔｓ　ａｎ　ｅｍｐｔｙ　ｂｒｏｋｅｎ　ｃｏｎｅ　ｂｙ　ｔｈｅ　ｗａｙ．　

ｏｈ　ｗｅｌｌ，　ｔｈｅ　ｄａｙ　ｉｎ　ａ　ｌｉｆｅ　ｏｆ　ｓｃｈｏｏｌ．ａｎｄ　ｉ　ｈａｖｅ　ｎｏ　ｉｄｅａ　ｗｈａｔ　ｈａｐｅｎｅｄ　ｔｏ　ｔｈｅ　ｆｏｎｔ．　ｗｈｅｒｅ　ａｒｅ　ｏｕ　ｊｉａｊｕｎ？！！

Somehow I Knew I Loved You, Wish You Were Here.

2007-04-08T21:00:00.000+08:00

you may never know, that still, i miss you.

Take A Sad Song, And Make It Better.

2007-04-08T19:11:00.000+08:00

I was in a relatively happy mood, I truely was. It is the day after West Side has ended, had a great amount of sleep and slacking. Happy that I managed to record some parts of West Side, but i can't upload it due to international copyright reasons (heh heh, yes Yelyn's announcement is stuck in my head) etc. But I however record stuff such as warms ups and the last prep for our last production. Bird's eye view from the light box. (: Shall upload soon, I'm sure the cast would love to have it.

Back to where I started. Ah, yes. I was in a relatively happy mood. That was up until I started reading peoples' blogs, and my mood has been weighed down by seeing how others are so emotionally affected by what's going on around them.

Why is it people around are unhappy, dissatisified, find themselves caught up in webs of confusion.

And I can't do much to help. And here I am happy and contented.

--

On a lighter note, school starts again for us tomorrow, hinting impending over due homework and loads of curriculum to catch up on. And common tests are apparently starting, so I had better start getting into the groove. Gahh.

At least we're not falling behind for DEP. Half the class plus teachers were all milling around the theatre. I bet all the drama people miss us like crazy. You just might have been able to hear the sound of crickets last week.

Whallie Alvin has alerted me regarding my expressions of affection I mention on this portal that seem to have attracted a certain amount of attention. Haha.

Photos coming soon. Tata.

How Many People Can I Kill With This Gun, And Still Have One Left For Myself.

2007-04-06T11:53:00.000+08:00

This whole week I have been dressed in all black, running around in cold freezing dark spots and getting blasted by disconcerting gun shots.

Yes, it has been theatre week. Waha.

Been in DBS Arts Centre for many days, prancing around and clicking light cues. I make those swirly cool funky lights go up and down. Tralala. Been up in the light box with Jinx and sometimes Kamal every show.

There are about 180 plus light cues for this production.

Which means I have been lidtening to the songs for countless times, rehearsals, run throughs, clean ups and the shows themselves. I think they have effectively all stuck in my head.

Its Good Friday today so call time is a little later. Crew always comes way earlier than cast by the way. Heh.

2 down, 3 to go.

And everyone, if you're not coming for West Side Story, you are really missing out. (:

Toodles.

P.S. (SPOILER ALERT)

The GUN SHOT at the end is COOL.

We are using a .38 revolver blank shot. It is VERY loud. And VERY real.

Remember Me, Once In A While, Promise Me You'll Try.

2007-04-01T10:38:00.000+08:00

Tralala. Been a busy packed lovely few days.

Friday was Humanes Scholarship interview training, which erm, well, yes. Hopefully I don't screw up on Tuesday.

After which a frantic scurry over to LASELLE for BA(hons) Musical Theatre production 'Once On This Island'. Wooooo, *faints* It was sooooo entertaining and energetic and the singers were EXCELLENT. And the little girl Ti Moune was sooo adorable.

I WANT THE SOUNDTRACK. GIMME GIMME.

We had fun waiting for Lesley's parents to give us a ride home. Dancing, laughing, bitching. I hugged Mark so much to make up for 2 weeks. And I got a piggy back ride! Which was so fun, haven't had that in a looonnnggg time.

Sat was West Side Rehearsals the whole day from 10 am to 7 pm, after which I scurried home for a bathe and gobbled down dinner and came back to school to send the SOUTH AFRICAN GIRLS OFF. Homeward bound they are.

I felt compelled to go to the workshop to help the crew out and ended up going home at 11 with a number of paint marks all over myself. Me and chu sat on the pavement outside school, singing random musical and disney songs while waiting for her daddy to come. I refused to walk home for the DEAD rat upon the pavement on the way back and LIVE ones running about. In the end Roxanne's parents fetched us both home. How pointless is it using a car to send me from AC back home you have nooo idea.

Its quiet and nice and dark and windy in school at night, I really did feel like running round the track. As of now, emotional baggage no longer comes in intense bouts, just a slight wistful-ness. Sometimes its just a little difficult to forget and put down, eh? And at times, that's just the way it goes. And till now, a little missing.

p.s. I just realised its April Fools. DON'T PULL SOMETHING DUMB ON ME. I SWEAR. haha.
Meeting OG for 'Muse' AC Band Concert in a while. Hurray.

Te Adoro, Anton.

2007-03-29T21:38:00.000+08:00

I so want the West Side sound track. Gah.

The pace of school work is finally picking up, and I actually have been ON TASK IN MY WORK.

This weekend, despite not having to go to school AN ENTIRE WEEK (blue-slipped the whole of next week), I shall still complete my work.

1. GP essay
2. Math Tutorial 5
3. Math Assignment
4. Econs Tutorial

Ah yes, i now take H1 math. Which despite it being almost exactly the same as A math, status quo remains at being totally sucky at it.

I AM SO AIMING FOR ALL As. Ah well, AH is expected to do well. And people in my class are not only smart, but closet mugger sorts who can be really scary. They play, but still achieve. And seriously, they may not look it, but some of them are REALLY REALLY smart. Shudders.

MARIA

He just came to deliver aspirin.
ANITA
You'll need it.
TONY
No, we're out of the world.
ANITA
You're out of you're heads.
TONY
We're twelve feet in the air.
MARIA
(gently taking his hand)
Anita can see all that.
(To Anita)
You will not tell?
ANITA
Tell what? How can I hear what goes on twelve feet over my head?

Tonight, tonight.

2007-03-26T20:32:00.000+08:00

The stars are really bright in the sky tonight, and after watching quite a few west side story rehearsals, I have fallen in love with the musical's songs. Tralala. I'm trying to learn all the songs by the time production is over, which shouldn't be too hard. More than half is already stuck on replay in my head.

I have yet to watch Act Two of West side, but I'm suspecting it'll be too heart-wrenchingly tragic I won't be able to take it. AHH, the pain.

Its been 50 years since West side was first performed, and isn't it amazing how we can be still so hooked onto it!

Speaking of which, I may like to audition for Broadway Night. But need to find a male partner preferably. Whee. ONE NEW MALE DEPper. Excellent. May be doing duolouge for exam piece with De Wei, one act from David Ives 'Mere Mortal', 'Dr. Fritz and the Forces Of Light.' Tralala. Its hilarious.

South African girls are over in S'pore! Sat was spent on preparing and having breakfast with the girls, West side rehearsals, and dying my hair BLACK. Its BLACK now, applaud. The whole of Sunday was dedicated to heritage tour with the girls. LOTS of walking and talking and arguing with Mr Tan regarding which way to head, whether to take the lifts or the escalators etc. I must say Madam was very amused.

tonight, tonight....

it sucks to be me!(:

Why Do You Suppose It Hurts When It Does?

2007-03-21T20:31:00.000+08:00

When I find my heaven I'll bring you there,
But right now I'm just falling, falling and falling again.

Sometimes we try to see,
But we just are blind.
When I find my sight I'll show you the way,
But right now I just need a little guidance,
It's not always as easy as it seems.

I would like to lean against you,
For some comfort and a little warmth.
When I find the courage I'll tell you so,
But right now you're just a far away illusion,
An unattainable dream.

If love is a drug, I guess we are all sober.

ENLIGHTENMENT.

2007-03-20T18:03:00.000+08:00

Its been days of realisation.

Realisation ONE: I AM in AH, and no I didn't read off the board wrongly.

Its not bad in AH, and I adapt quickly. There are perks to whatever happens to my life, and we shall go with the flow! It's called being happy-go-lucky. I am however still an honorary member of AA1, there are too many people I will be stuck with my 2 years. So many DEPpers! (: A grand total of 8! out of like 29.

I do however have Jia Jun with me in AH! Me heart Jiajun. We're the dynamic duo of AH! Woo. Form tutor asked us to consider running for council. Hmm.

Realisation TWO: Whenever I am being introduced, my "STRIPPER" past will inevitably be happily announced.

It happened during class introductions. Despite only having ONE DEPper in AH, Lesley dear still loves to mention my 'stripper' tendencies. Er.

Me: "Hi yah I'm YinLing!"
Les: "Do you know she strips?!"

Luckily most people catch no balls.
--

It happened during our first official meeting with new DEPpers as well.

"Do you know she strips?!"

And everyone bursts out laughing. Kester's laughter was the most animated, I wonder why. References to my NOL eh-hem movements are made as well.

Chu was also talking about attire in the DEP workshop, blacks, shorts blah. And she went on to say,

Chu: "No bras and panties ok!"
Rox: "Yes we all know you're eager to take off your clothes chu"
Me: "Yes, calm down chu."
Chu: " But YOU'RE the one who strips! HAHA"

Realisation THREE: DEP is severely male-deprived.

I think there are officially 7 guys in DEP out of 29. SEVEN. Mark, Kester, Xun Wei, Mao Mao, Isaac, De Wei, and our one and only new guy Gabriel. That's all I think, yes.

And Kester's a teeny little worried for his 'manliness' and manhood. He will have to fight it out with chu for the crown of 'Most Manly' in DEP now.

Realisation FOUR: I hang around really rather interesting people.

I hang around deviants, trouble-makers of their secondary schools, head prefects of their ah-beng secondary schools, twin brothers of RGS girls, 'bimbos', himbos etc etc.

No kidding.
Well, never would have gotten to know these kids in rj. (: And my existing friends in rj are here to stay. ^.^v

Realisation FIVE: I'm a happy kid.^.^v

AH Qing Tian Pi Li.

2007-03-18T20:29:00.000+08:00

GAHHHH.

Went to school to check my class today and guess what.

I got posted to 1AH.

AND EVERYONE IS STILL IN AA1~!

chu, bev, ning, cas etc. etc.

I never for once thought that I would be put in AH, for I don't have O level results and AH has all the 6-7 pointer (raw, mind you) Humanities kids.

BEV AND NING HAVE THE SAME COMBI AS ME, and I was planning on spending the school year hanging out all the time with these great people. And chuuu as well.

BAH.

Who do I know in AH. Erms, jiajun and tzus. Nice people.

On the other hand, I won't have to face a certain teacher any longer.

Ahh, I don't know what to think now.

For all I know, I read the board wrongly.

P.S. AND GAHHHHHHHHHHHH I'M GONNA MISS ALL THE DEP-PERS WHO ARE DROPPING OR COULDN'T MAKE IT/DIDN'T COME BACK. here's to nick, dheraj, rikh, caleb, derrick, raymus, cheryl, christabel and everyone.

Its At Times Like This, I Am Starkly Reminded How I Have Never Really Stopped Missing You.

2007-03-14T21:01:00.000+08:00

Pool and settler's with josh, jixiong and hanlin yesterday! woo. met celene-san and rj gang at pool place :) :) board/card games rule.

Roller blading with fang and sianying today at east coast! ^.^v I've now got a really pretty tan outline of my shirt on me.

Going to JB/Malacca with family tomorrow!

Random shooting of updates completed, back to American Idol. whee.

acjc orientation 2007 video part 2

2007-03-10T21:32:00.001+08:00

OOH-AHH.