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YINLING ♥ | | Birds flying high You know how I feel Sun in the sky You know how I feel Reeds driftin' on by You know how I feel It's a new dawn It's a new day It's a new life For me And I'm feeling good |
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CHATTERBOX
DECLARATIONS
WISHFUL
RUNAWAY
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Desiger/edited by: MilkshakeeeBasecode: doughnutcrazy Music: LALALA! Icon: Picture Cbox: Tag |
raggedy muse
8:00 PM bahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. don't bother again. (and what else makes me go bahhhhhh like that) spent the afternoon at esplanade library and walking around cityhall AGAIN, and finished reading Kuo Bao Kun's "Coffin too big for the hole and other plays". And flipped through his 'biography' of sorts. *ADMIRATION* yay, am quite inspired by him. i love his 棺材太大洞太小！i watched 梁志强 act it in his one man show. cant remember his english name for some reason! grr. brilliant play wright, and a pioneer in singapore theatre. i suppose i am kinda trained in his style of plays, cos our chinese drama instructor is the co artistic director of Theatre Practice 实践, which Kuo Bao Kun used to be artistic director of if i am not wrong. yup no doubt, the whole 抽象 concept, the BIG TREE thing haha, very reminescent of 傻小妹和怪老树。fine. no one knows what on earth am i rambling about. and the 巨人 play in nanyang's chinese drama night. again very 实践 style. or so i feel. whee. oh yes. i am inspired to start writing a play! i attempted last year, to write one for our this year's yanchu, but it just didn't materialise. i'll probably give up half way again, but still i'll give it a try. :D by the way nanyang and hci's production was emmaculate in my opinion. compared to ours, ha ha. ours wasn't bad, but by their standards, whoa. one measure of the effort put in was the amount of tears and cheering after the final show. whoa. ours was, er, lets quickly go home now shall we. but theirs was a larger scale performance, and they had more performances than us, so i guess the build-up was greater. but seriously, they have to be applauded. great quality. rambling on and on about theatre, don't bother about me heh. i could ramble more on how good their production was, but i'll spare you. yay. i am not even sure if i really really want to or will further my career into a fully fledged theatre one. it's a hell a lot of hard work and the literal rewards are sometimes pretty elusive. will i really be able to be that passionate worker of the arts, i don't know. we'll see. for now, in the protected world of education and schooling, i'll drown myself in theatre all i want. there are no repercussions of reality to deter me. if i do go into it, then i'll try my best to make all my experience in the mandarin and english theatre circles (and yes, the styles of both are different), and chinese opera, all its worth. yay. we'll see how my er, play will turn out. wheeee. i think i'll write it in chinese? then i can maybe donate it back to chinese drama for next year or something. i think the sec 3s this year need alot of help to keep it going. and yes its going on! i think there will be chinese drama syf!!! so our cca will live. woo. netball carn on monday. and the reigning champions, 410, has not trained at all. haha. and fang and qing are damn stressed, for last year.... 310 was unbeatable. literally. 13 out of 13 games we won. 通杀! wahahaha. we have a name to live up to, and all the classes are clamouring to beat us. and everyone is like, training their butts off. some classes have trained 3 times in the week. and everyone is like, aiyah 410, you all don't need to train lah. haha. good luck. but a few of them are training tmr! oil the rust away! JIAYOU! come on man! keep the perfect record! NE quiz was amusing. the comps in the lab were very screwed, and kept hanging. i'm sure more than half the class had to redo it. i had to redo it thrice, my comps died on me halfway through 2 times. answer NE questions to earn money and build stuff on singapore to earn credit. amusing. OH YEAH. i shud go check my options. OH YEAH. I GOT MY FIRST OPTION. whee. which is
whee. i better go check my timetable. i'm gonna have to rush from school to s'pore poly in under 1/2 hour. how is that gonna be possible. unless i take a cab. grr. NO MONEY. but i didn't have any other choice lahs. options timetable is very confounded. and naturally so. clashes with my financial literacy!! lala. i think i have too much to ramble about. *bounces around* well. here's the deal. i've decided i am not going to continue being a wasted emotional drain anymore. and i have succeeded. whee. looking at these few days entries wouldn't you say that too? but then... i go gaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh again. haha. but why shouldn't i be. my decision not to wallow in the torment doesn't mean feelings are nulled. unfortunately, thats pretty near impossible. so now what. now. all i can say. is that i can only wait. something that a lot of people might not be so extremely pleased to hear. but blleeeaaaaahhh. what else can i do. i know that it will be virtually unattainable to move on with someone stuck forever in the back of my mind, or the front of it at alot of times. for knowing, and not knowing, for thinking, and not being able to think, for heart beats, or the lack of it, for the unexplain-ables, for the 没有理由。如此多的理由。如此无法解释。 im highly tempted to delete the whole last few paragraphs. GAHHH. i think it might be getting tiring as its been said too many times before. and why? for all the things that i have said before. for i have stayed constant throughout. all throughout. 不要求他陪她走到尽头 只要他和她牵手走到缘分已尽 无怨无悔 只要求做到无怨无悔 不然要你我后悔莫及吗？ 直到我说忘掉你我无怨无悔的那一天。 直到我打从心里呐喊缘分真的尽了。 and i have no idea if i should hope for 那一天 to come soon, or never to come. unfortunately, even if i had any idea what to hope, hope doesn't always go your way does it. so i should lower my hopes, which aren't much i might say, so that whatever happens, at least i won't be let down too much, or i will be over-the-top in ecstasy with it exceeding my hopes. all too many people say patience is a virtue. and it rewards you. i know all too well it might not in this case. i'm no naive kid with naive fantasies. but i am a kid. unable to be anything but patient. patient for something, or nothing. in wait of something, or for that something to become nothing. a toast to the day of no regret! P.S. i need inspiration for my non-existant play ---- now that that is out of my system, time to revert to my happy-bimbotic-lack-of-deep-cognitive-function-and-reflection self. ooops. TECHNIQUES OF INTEGRATION. GRRRRRRRRRR. if only that self were more permanent. or if i could totally switch to my different selves on cue. if for any one time i wasn't the self that makes me a A* lit student. then maybe i won't think and reflect so much. maybe i'll be less discerning and less foolish. ironically. |
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YINLING ♥ | | Birds flying high You know how I feel Sun in the sky You know how I feel Reeds driftin' on by You know how I feel It's a new dawn It's a new day It's a new life For me And I'm feeling good |
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CHATTERBOX
DECLARATIONS
WISHFUL
RUNAWAY
REWIND
CREDITS
Desiger/edited by: MilkshakeeeBasecode: doughnutcrazy Music: LALALA! Icon: Picture Cbox: Tag |
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